How to talk to girls?

[Outcast]

Any advice out there?

I just recently tried to talking to someone new. She was kinda introduced by a friend of a relative.

Ended up just asking too many questions. And when she made that remark. "Wow. So many questions." I guess i panicked like usual and cut the conversation short with an apology and told her i'd text her next time and let her continue with her work? And that she's probably busy..

I feel that i made a mistake though. By bailing out too quickly from the conversation. <sighs>.

Anyway, just wanted to let that all out of my system. Still hoping she would respond more or less in a positive way. If not, live and learn again i suppose.


Edit: I got her reply a little later in the day. Apparently, she was ok with everything. Guess i made such a big deal out of nothing. *shrugs* I really need to remember not to take these things too seriously.

[Zoe]

Jul 28, 2016 4:43:44 GMT -5 Outcast said:

Any advice out there?

I just recently tried to talking to someone new. She was kinda introduced by a friend of a relative.

Ended up just asking too many questions. And when she made that remark. "Wow. So many questions." I guess i panicked like usual and cut the conversation short with an apology and told her i'd text her next time and let her continue with her work? And that she's probably busy..

I feel that i made a mistake though. By bailing out too quickly from the conversation. <sighs>.

Anyway, just wanted to let that all out of my system. Still hoping she would respond more or less in a positive way. If not, live and learn again i suppose.


Edit: I got her reply a little later in the day. Apparently, she was ok with everything. Guess i made such a big deal out of nothing. *shrugs* I really need to remember not to take these things too seriously.

I feel that as shy people, we sometime overthink a fair bit of the interactions we have with others everyday. Good job for actually getting out these and talking with other people. It ain't easy

[ura]

Aug 6, 2016 8:56:52 GMT -5 Zoe said:

I feel that as shy people, we sometime overthink a fair bit of the interactions we have with others everyday. Good job for actually getting out these and talking with other people. It ain't easy

That's very, very true.

[Outcast]

Yeah. I usually overthink things a lot when it comes to my interaction with other people. I guess i'm paranoid like that, always fearful that people will not like me as they get to talk to me, or know me more.

I think i became over eager to talk to the girl in trying to get to know more about her. So from this experience, i would probably say to others that it might be best not to rush things. Just try to go with the flow of the conversation maybe. It maybe that i was also guilty of trying to impress her by way of making it seem like i'm "normal". So i made a note to myself that i shouldn't try to impress her that way, and maybe try to be comfortable with who i really am, and don't be ashamed to show it. Showing it probably only when asked or if the conversation eventually leads to that point.

Also, i could be guilty of judging her and other people quickly on how they respond to me. With that, it maybe be best if i can control/stop myself from doing that.

Thanks for the replies.

[Outcast]

I don't know. Maybe i'm just not used to how she responds to my texts. She replies to them unusually long. It would take hours, sometimes even a day before i get her reply. Is that how some people do it? I guess some people don't like chatting or having a conversation thru text messages. As such, i'm likewise trying to do the same. I mean if that's how she likes it. Texting every couple of hours or so.

But doing it like way, i'm kinda losing interest because at the same time, i'm feeling she's not really that interested. Or maybe i'm indeed just boring her because i really don't have any interesting ideas, topics or questions to bring up.

Other people would say, so what. Just continue trying and so on and so forth. But i don't know. Is it good for me to continue to do so? And continue to feel that somehow she really isn't interested, and she's trying to give me a hint or something?

I'm doing this, because i don't want other people to think that i didn't try. I want to show them that i did try. And it may seem easy for them, but for me the results just end up quite different. Am i over reacting and thinking way too much again?

I want to continue trying to chat with her thru texts. But right now, the desire to do so is getting weaker. Maybe i need to take a break for a while.

[Outcast]

Sorry. Upon further reflection, i think its just me over reacting again. I shouldnt have reacted that way. I shouldnt have taken it against her. She's probably busy with lots of stuff.

Anyway, i am running out of ideas or topics to talk about. So i dont think she would mind if i stopped? For a while? Im not confident in bringing in topics she might not be interested in. I dunno. Maybe in time, i can think of a good one, so we can try resuming communication. For now, im unsure and hesitant. Still afraid to make a mistake. Which i know is pretty pathetic. Considering im a guy. Men are expected to be braver than that. Hmmm, could it be pride thats stopping me? That i should try to expose myself to the possibilty of shame? Overthinking again. Stopping myself now.