OK I'm reeeally starting to get a complex, thinking I must have a speech impediment or something! I find that people are always asking me to repeat myself. It's so annoying! I've been told that I just have a soft voice, and I'm not really sure if it's because I don't speak up enough or if that's just the way my voice is. I have to sit in for the receptionist today, and have been answering the phone in what I THOUGHT was a normal, clear voice, but keep getting "wha?.." "excuse me?.." Gah! I feel like I have to practically fricken SHOUT to get my point across. Thing is, the more people ask me to repeat myself, the more self-conscious I get about the way I sound, so I screw up even more. Just wondering if anyone else has this problem, or if maybe it is just me.
Here's to Alcohol--the problem of, and the solution to, all of life's problems.
It's better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you're stupid than to open it and remove all doubt~ unknown
Post by GreenFerret on Aug 23, 2004 12:32:45 GMT -5
The same thing happens to me. I hate it. I guess our voices just sound louder in our heads than they do out loud? I don't really know, but it seems there's not much else we can do other than get used to either being asked to speak louder, or to practically shouting at people. But, yeah... This is definitely a very annoying problem for me.
"Anyone who wants to know the human psyche... would be better advised to abandon exact science, put away his scholar's gown, bid farewell to his study, and wander with human heart throughout the world." -Carl Jung
Post by theenglishman on Aug 23, 2004 14:08:44 GMT -5
I am kind of the same, but my problem is I mumble which is very annoying for the person listening i'm sure! but I can't help it, sometimes I'm not sure what I'm going to say next so it comes out all garbled.
Its interesting you have the problem of getting people always asking you to repeat yourself! Its the opposite for me, I am usually concentrating on feeling anxious that I don't listen very well - I must come across as very rude!..oh well
Wow, I'm glad I'm not the only one with this problem. I thought people dodn't understand what I say because of my accent but it must be something else. One of the big reasons why I don't like to talk a lot is because I feel that nobody is going to understand me and I have to repeat myself. Repeating myself is one of the most annoyin things in the world.
yea it happens to me a lot.. like i think im speaking loud enough but i don't or like.. sometimes when im nervous and i wanna say something that has more then one sentence i stumble across my words and all and it dosen't sound good in the end.
I get people telling me I mumble or don't speak loud enough. The worst for me though, is feeling like all the words that I want to say are getting shaken up in a cup, like dice, and thrown out wherever. Sometimes it's so bad, I don't make sense (that ususally only happens in extreme situations). It's frustrating because I know in my head what I want to say, but my shyness and anxiety act as "intelligence filters". This is probably why I don't talk too much.
Same for me. It's gotten worse over the years, which I think is attributed to building a complex about it. I never used to have this problem, but it over the last few years...no one can understand me. It's worse on the phone...mobile phone, which is why I detest conversing on the phone. I'd rather talk face to face for this reason, though I hate that too !
Wonder if there is some training that can help me clear my speech so it's not so mumbled? I have thought about this a lot in the past couple years, going to some speech therapy.
Talking slower seems to help, but that's hard to remember to do. The people closest to me never have a problem....maybe they've just gotten used to it....or maybe I talk differently around them because I'm more confident with them.
When I'm at work, around people who I know are more knowledgeable than me, it's gets worse b/c I'm so nervous about not being as smart as they are. Sucks.
I have post-it's next to my computer that say - slow down, speak clearly ! b/c I have a lot of business calls....I get so jealous when I hear others talking so clearly and seems so easy for them.
About 15 yrs ago I developed a stutter but overcame it as I was entering my first year as a school teacher. I'm convinced that I developed the stutter from a former boss who told me that I would make a terrible teacher.
I think the new mumbling and softer speech has come about from a similar feeling of low confidence in the area of my new work...technology.
Anyway, good luck to you all. It makes me feel better that there are others out there with similar issues.
Post by perceptron on Sept 1, 2014 21:32:35 GMT -5
It's fairly normal that our voices sound different to others than what we perceive internally. I know I was shocked when I first heard my recorded voice. It's likely that you speak too softly for people to be heard. There is nothing to worry about. You can record yourself on your computer or phone and play it back to see what the deal is. It may be that you need speak with more effort to be heard by everyone, which could benefit you in more ways than one. People also tend to listen to loudmouths a lot more than the quiet ones
I decided today I've had enough and am trying to find answers to this problem. I can't take it anymore. I have to say everything to everyone twice. And sometimes people will think i say something else when i answer. Yes or no questions are killer because sometimes I'll say yeah and people hear no. So I'm really practicing responding 'yes' instead. The worst thing ever is my name is Joe but a good 50% of the time when I introduce myself to someone they think I say Gerald. In my head I sound pretty clear.
I think i know how that feels. Sometimes people would ask me to repeat myself too. I think i normally have a soft voice. When i try to make it louder it seems like i'm shouting to me. But even then, i have trouble shouting at the top of my lungs. Probably because i'm conscious of other people taking notice of it. Or taking notice of me.
Maybe i'm so not used to talking with other people that my voice ends up just being just the way it is. I also usually notice this happening when i'm tense and too self conscious.
Doing and saying the wrong things most of the time 24/7. Being me means having to endure people not liking me.