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Post by nicole555 on Mar 17, 2009 22:01:28 GMT -5
Are you embarrassed by your shyness? When your around family/friends do you feel embarrassed that your not talking as much as the other people there? Also do get a little annoyed/embarrassed when someone who you know very well says something about you being shy or that you don't want to talk to people?
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Post by Scotty on Mar 17, 2009 22:12:44 GMT -5
Occasionaly. It bothered me one time when a friend of mine used "And this shy one here is Neil." as an introduction. She didn't mean anything bad by it, but I would have preffered that she'd used 'quiet' instead of 'shy'.
It does bother me that i'm not outgoing around friends and even family but it's not really because I'm shy...a lot of the time i just don't have anything to say.
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Post by shynesssucks on Mar 18, 2009 6:09:25 GMT -5
my shyness is embarrassing to me but only from my immediate family. for the most part my family doesn't realize how i interact with outside the home and i would be pretty embarrassed if they found out..it's a weird ego thing. i don't want to come across weak i guess.
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Post by urbanspaceman on Mar 18, 2009 6:52:03 GMT -5
In some respects I care a lot less about how people see me, which in turn (and alongside other things) has helped me come out of my shell more.
Having said that, little things can still bother me a great deal. I can still be referred to as 'the shy one' in situations where I feel I've been a lot more talkative than I would've been a few years ago, with people I normally would've been virtually mute around. This does bother me as I don't want the shyness to be the first or only thing that comes to mind when someone thinks of me. I know the vast majority of the time it's not meant in a mean way, but I wouldn't mind being referred to as friendly, or funny, or at least not something that always links back to how quiet I can be.
I've noticed how people referring to me in this way can affect how other people view me too. I've tried hard not to close off or be as shy around new people of late, to the point where at least one person is surprised how others talk about me being really quiet or extremely shy. So the work I put into getting to know people, or just being more outgoing than I normally would be can get undermined by this huge, great bloody sign I have around my neck.
I don't hate being shy, I think I'm just annoyed at how hard it can be to show people other sides of you when everything will be filtered through the shyness label. Or let yourself show them I suppose.
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Post by rukryM on Mar 20, 2009 13:49:12 GMT -5
I'm not embarrassed about the shyness in itself, since I know there are others out there who are just like me and are normal human beings. It it more the consequences that I dread and am sometimes ashamed of. When in a social situation I mostly cannot make jokes, stories and keep positive, happy tone of joy like others, hence I become the more humble, serious one who everyone think doesn't have any humour ^^. It makes me feel awkward a lot of times.
I've never had people tell me explicitly that I don't talk much, if they choose to do so then I don't know how I would react, I'd probably make up some lame excuses and try to focus on something else.
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Post by strawberrysweetie on Mar 20, 2009 17:43:38 GMT -5
Are you embarrassed by your shyness? When your around family/friends do you feel embarrassed that your not talking as much as the other people there? Also do get a little annoyed/embarrassed when someone who you know very well says something about you being shy or that you don't want to talk to people? I would say I am definitely embarrassed by it. If it were more mild, I'd probably be okay. But it's the fact that I've let it take over my life, more than anything, that embarrasses me. I just visited my family a couple of days ago. And was talking to a couple of my older sisters. I hate when they ask what I've been up to and especially when they ask what I plan to do (career-wise). I flat out said that I didn't know. My brother-in-law was there too, trying to talk to me, and I just....I don't know....I couldn't talk about what he wanted to talk about. I just found conversing with them depressing. Probably why my main goal of visiting back home is to spend time with my nephews and nieces and younger sibs. They don't ask me about my future plans. They're just glad to see me, which feels great. My quietness around my family doesn't really bother me so much, though...just when they mention how quiet I seem to be or ask if something's wrong since I'm so quiet. I tend to be louder around the younger ones. I think I just can't relate on an adult level of talk...because experience-wise, I'm just not there. And I find that embarrassing. It does bother me that i'm not outgoing around friends and even family but it's not really because I'm shy...a lot of the time i just don't have anything to say. I often find myself this way....not necessarily not talking out of fear, just out of the fact that I've got nothing to say. More often than not I'm just more an observer/listener. I find this really frustrating.
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Post by GoldenRose82 on Jun 24, 2009 1:27:07 GMT -5
I do get embarrassed about it sometimes. I'm in college, and ever since elementary it seems like many of my teachers always end up making a comment about me being so quiet (typically they'll say I'm the most quiet person they've ever met). I hate being pointed out because of my quietness when other people aren't pointed out when they talk a lot.
Whenever I'm at family gatherings, someone always says something about my quietness there too... I feel like they probably think I'm mentally retarded somehow because everyone else is able to hold a conversation, whereas I am not. Sometimes when I meet people for the first time and I just can't find the words to keep the conversation going, they will give me this look...maybe I'm just being paranoid, but I think many people look at me funny when I don't say much, or when I do say something and it has a tendency to come out as awkward.
Like Strawberry said, a lot of times people, esp. my family, will ask about my future plans and stuff, and I will tell them I don't know... And I really don't. But again, they'll give me this look like I'm weird or they just don't believe me... And that's embarrassing. It makes me feel like there really is something wrong with me.
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Post by arizona on Jul 1, 2009 19:51:01 GMT -5
Yes, sometimes I'm embarrassed.
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jai
Full Member
Posts: 131
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Post by jai on Jul 3, 2009 6:29:21 GMT -5
Frustration, embarrassment, humiliation at times. But I still consider myself to be the best out there and I never wish I was anybody else but myself.
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Post by lilangelxo on Jul 3, 2009 16:02:01 GMT -5
Yeah i do feel embarrased. When people started on me at school and i was talking to someone about it i'd never say i was just shy or just too quiet i'd always say i felt so embarrased. At being shown up probably. I felt embarrased when people put me down and spoke for me, obviously because they thought i couldn't do it myself. And thinking back to school times i probably couldn't have a few times. I'm glad i actually had their support even though (maybe i just think) i didn't actually deserve it cos i was so shy and felt that i coulldn't make the effort with them most times. They were all screaming out for me to talk, even thinking back to primary school times. (came into my head this week randomly) on p7 camp i really managed to open up to my class and teachers. Which was oddd..and i don't even remember why, but i felt so embarrased that for some reason as soon as we came back from camp i just started being as shy as ever again. And i remember my teacher always saying to the class 'we liked you better when you weren't shy on camp' and i always felt (and still do looking back) v embarrased at the whole thing. Argh. I just wish i could be someone confident that doesn't care how they come across. And i think it is from worrying that i come across silly or will make a fool outa myself that stops me being confident. Oh well. xxx
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Post by Rose on Jul 3, 2009 16:31:31 GMT -5
I wouldn't say I'm embarrassed... more just occasionally self conscious, if that's a difference, lol. Luckily no one's gone so far as to point out my quietness to others in front of me in a group. Maybe because I tend to avoid staying in one place for too long in social gatherings. I do sometimes worry about appearing rude or disinterested though.
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