Post by Wednesday on Feb 20, 2011 2:25:45 GMT -5
I hate not knowing if I'm right or if I'm wrong. But if there's one thing I do know, however, it's that I try to look at both sides of a situation to balance things. To be fair.
So. I'll start with Thursday. (Yes, I'm sorry)
Thursday night my best friend calls me to tell me that she's "set me up on a date" with a guy who I've only met once. So not only was I invited to have dinner with her and her boyfriend so she could tell me that she was engaged, but I'd been set up on a date with this guy (who I really can't say anything bad about, he is nice) but I mean, the situation was already uncomfortable. Also, a date on with a broken leg? Really? Anyways, I continue to tell her I do not believe in date set ups and that although I do think this person is very nice, I do not feel comfortable. I don't know! Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I still believe that if a guy wants a date he should ask for it himself (not sure if she just said he'd been the one to ask for the date to make me feel better) but I still also don't believe in going out on a date not knowing if the other person agreed (like he knew) and that he expected me to show up just like that. I'm sorry, but no.
I finally ask her if she can please give me his number to call and cancel. I was willing to do that despite the fact that it was going to be extremely hard for me because 1. I didn't know how he was going to take it (not because I'm such a great catch or anything like that) but I mean, I know that most people like these kinds of things. I don't know… And 2. I mean, yes, maybe I don't have a boyfriend. But I'm not desperate. Would I like to have someone? Yes. But if it happens, it happens. If not, I'm alright with too. (I think?!?)
But anyways, she finally says she'll cancel. She does. We proceed to go to dinner on Friday night so she can tell me she's engaged. (this was probably the happiest moment of the night)
Sat - "Mardi Gras"
So we had arranged to go to our local Mardi Gras event. Yeah, I know. Don't ask.
So it was just a bunch of friends and… me. As it turns out, I was again not informed that this person I was supposed to have been on a date with the day before was going to be there.
Strangely, however, it turns out he was there because not only do we share some common friends but because he wanted to say "sorry" if he had made me feel bad for the whole date thing the day before. I said it was fine. He asked if I would mind getting to know him so that maybe eventually we could go on a "real" date. I said we would see by the end of the night. The end of the night came. He offered to take me home. He grabbed my hand while I was trying to open my door (which was understandable seeing as I was having a terrible time balancing myself) but then…
He tried to kiss me.
*Sigh*
I told him that I was sorry, but that I wasn't ready for that. That yes, maybe I was old fashioned. He said he was sorry again. I said goodnight and... here I am.
I mean. Honestly, he was a nice guy throughout the entire night. I was thinking maybe, just maybe it would be fun to go on a date with him after getting to know him that night. But then he went and did that, which kinda changed my mind.
I don't know if I'm making a big deal out of something so small. But I would have totally understood that move if we had clicked. I mean yeah, we got along pretty good… but I just didn't want to kiss him on the first night I spend time with him and when we are technically not even out on a date. Or I would have understood if it was obvious we had both liked each other. I really hate to put it that way.
It also hurts me, that my adorable friends ditched me thinking this was "cute" or "funny" or whatever they thought it was!
Am I insane? I probably am. Why do I have to think so much about things? Was I mean, or unfair? I cannot get that thought out of my head. I hate feeling guilty. I really don't know.
I'm sorry for once again having to read me complain. Getting tired of so much complaining lately. AND I also am not sure if this belongs here, but I'm not exactly known for putting things where they belong, so... haha sorry!
So. I'll start with Thursday. (Yes, I'm sorry)
Thursday night my best friend calls me to tell me that she's "set me up on a date" with a guy who I've only met once. So not only was I invited to have dinner with her and her boyfriend so she could tell me that she was engaged, but I'd been set up on a date with this guy (who I really can't say anything bad about, he is nice) but I mean, the situation was already uncomfortable. Also, a date on with a broken leg? Really? Anyways, I continue to tell her I do not believe in date set ups and that although I do think this person is very nice, I do not feel comfortable. I don't know! Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I still believe that if a guy wants a date he should ask for it himself (not sure if she just said he'd been the one to ask for the date to make me feel better) but I still also don't believe in going out on a date not knowing if the other person agreed (like he knew) and that he expected me to show up just like that. I'm sorry, but no.
I finally ask her if she can please give me his number to call and cancel. I was willing to do that despite the fact that it was going to be extremely hard for me because 1. I didn't know how he was going to take it (not because I'm such a great catch or anything like that) but I mean, I know that most people like these kinds of things. I don't know… And 2. I mean, yes, maybe I don't have a boyfriend. But I'm not desperate. Would I like to have someone? Yes. But if it happens, it happens. If not, I'm alright with too. (I think?!?)
But anyways, she finally says she'll cancel. She does. We proceed to go to dinner on Friday night so she can tell me she's engaged. (this was probably the happiest moment of the night)
Sat - "Mardi Gras"
So we had arranged to go to our local Mardi Gras event. Yeah, I know. Don't ask.
So it was just a bunch of friends and… me. As it turns out, I was again not informed that this person I was supposed to have been on a date with the day before was going to be there. Strangely, however, it turns out he was there because not only do we share some common friends but because he wanted to say "sorry" if he had made me feel bad for the whole date thing the day before. I said it was fine. He asked if I would mind getting to know him so that maybe eventually we could go on a "real" date. I said we would see by the end of the night. The end of the night came. He offered to take me home. He grabbed my hand while I was trying to open my door (which was understandable seeing as I was having a terrible time balancing myself) but then…
He tried to kiss me.
*Sigh*
I told him that I was sorry, but that I wasn't ready for that. That yes, maybe I was old fashioned. He said he was sorry again. I said goodnight and... here I am.
I mean. Honestly, he was a nice guy throughout the entire night. I was thinking maybe, just maybe it would be fun to go on a date with him after getting to know him that night. But then he went and did that, which kinda changed my mind.
I don't know if I'm making a big deal out of something so small. But I would have totally understood that move if we had clicked. I mean yeah, we got along pretty good… but I just didn't want to kiss him on the first night I spend time with him and when we are technically not even out on a date. Or I would have understood if it was obvious we had both liked each other. I really hate to put it that way.
It also hurts me, that my adorable friends ditched me thinking this was "cute" or "funny" or whatever they thought it was!
Am I insane? I probably am. Why do I have to think so much about things? Was I mean, or unfair? I cannot get that thought out of my head. I hate feeling guilty. I really don't know.
I'm sorry for once again having to read me complain. Getting tired of so much complaining lately. AND I also am not sure if this belongs here, but I'm not exactly known for putting things where they belong, so... haha sorry!
