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Post by therockobama on Mar 25, 2011 13:55:06 GMT -5
So, in my Uni days, there was this girl who I instantly fell in love with, beautiful, she was just my sort of woman. Anyways, through misc meetings, I got to know her but my shyness prevented me from really talking in depth to her and asking her out. My mate enquired and turned out she was spoken for but still I have feelings for her. Aftr a long hiatus, she added me on facebook (weird part was I didn't know she knew my full name and she added me fairly quickly). I was chuffed and happy because I knew there was a chance that I could see if I had a chance albeit over the internet. But, I messaged her on her wall, but outta the blue she disappered and deactivated her account so dont know if she will come back online. If she does, how should I go about admitting my love for her?  |
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Post by Sweet Pea on Mar 25, 2011 14:03:00 GMT -5
are you sure you want to do that? from what you said, you had your shot and you didn't act. she probably has moved on, assuming you never would. from what you've said, she's probably in another relationship. i think the outcome of telling her you are in love with her is likely to be unpleasant unless she's an extremely unusual individual.
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Post by therockobama on Mar 25, 2011 14:14:06 GMT -5
Part of me wants to get my feelings out in the open, if she rejects me to the sidelines then at least I can move on knowing I did tell her. Whereas atm, even though I might have no chance, I can tell and whatever happens move on. She's a decent person, cant see her being unpleasant about it. I don't tend to say it right to her, "I love you" but in a conversation, slowly bring things out. Once done, if it's a rejection, I can move on.
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Post by Sweet Pea on Mar 25, 2011 14:21:18 GMT -5
Part of me wants to get my feelings out in the open, if she rejects me to the sidelines then at least I can move on knowing I did tell her. Whereas atm, even though I might have no chance, I can tell and whatever happens move on. She's a decent person, cant see her being unpleasant about it. I don't tend to say it right to her, "I love you" but in a conversation, slowly bring things out. Once done, if it's a rejection, I can move on. that's just not normal though. it doesn't sound like you even know each other all that well. to tell her your 'feelings' for her now is likely to just make her think you've got issues. the normal thing to do is ask her out. if SHE wants to get to know YOU better, she will accept. if not, there's no point in airing those feelings and getting them thrown back in your face. |
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Post by Karen on Mar 25, 2011 14:50:47 GMT -5
that's just not normal though. it doesn't sound like you even know each other all that well. to tell her your 'feelings' for her now is likely to just make her think you've got issues. the normal thing to do is ask her out. if SHE wants to get to know YOU better, she will accept. if not, there's no point in airing those feelings and getting them thrown back in your face. I'm afraid I have to agree with Sweet Pea, just throwing "I'm in love with you" on a person you (apparently) don't know that well, and who has dated other people since she knew you, is likely to just make her uncomfortable and reject you out of hand. You are much better off trying to get to know her again and maybe going on some dates with her. Just because you really, really like some one and you think to yourself "this could be the person for me" doesn't mean you are in love with them. It means you have a crush on them. I know those sorts of feelings can be really strong, but try to give it some time. If you go out with her, and spend alot of time getting to know her, and you still feel the same, (i.e. this is the person for me) then that is the time to tell her you love her. Good luck, I hope it all works out well for you. |
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Post by therockobama on Mar 25, 2011 21:36:12 GMT -5
Hate to admit but you guys are right. Jumping into things won't help me, if she does reappear, just going to take it slowly and get reacquainted and see how it goes. Thanks |
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gals
Full Member
Posts: 113
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Post by gals on Mar 31, 2011 8:02:45 GMT -5
So, in my Uni days, there was this girl who I instantly fell in love with, beautiful, she was just my sort of woman. Anyways, through misc meetings, I got to know her but my shyness prevented me from really talking in depth to her and asking her out. My mate enquired and turned out she was spoken for but still I have feelings for her. Aftr a long hiatus, she added me on facebook (weird part was I didn't know she knew my full name and she added me fairly quickly). I was chuffed and happy because I knew there was a chance that I could see if I had a chance albeit over the internet. But, I messaged her on her wall, but outta the blue she disappered and deactivated her account so dont know if she will come back online. If she does, how should I go about admitting my love for her? Why not? There's always 2nd chances and I'm a believer in 2nd chances. If before you kind of chickened out, well, maybe this is fate's telling you to be brave and go for it. At least you can always say you tried |
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