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Post by casanova2 on Jan 13, 2012 2:47:43 GMT -5
I have been in a relationship for 5 months.And we love each other but i have noticed lately that we struggle to make conversation with each other. Its making me anxious about the problem as there are alot of uncomfortable silences.I also think we don't know each other as well as we should. I not sure what to talk about?help
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Post by Sexy Spork #37 on Jan 13, 2012 9:12:24 GMT -5
I know people who ask questions on this site like quick responses, so I'll give you one, but bear in mind, I've never been in a relationship, so I'm almost certainly not in the right position to offer you much help.
My advice would be to sit down with her and talk about your relationship. No doubt she's noticed the silence as well. Whilst trying to find a solution may be the best answer regarding some issues, this isn't one of them. When you're struggling to find things to talk about and there are akward silences, it's usually a sign that something in the relationship has gone astray and you must find time to talk about the relationship. Find the problem and hopefully you'll find the solution. It may just be that you need to spend more time together.
As I say, I don't really know what I'm talking about, but I hope you work things out.
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Post by lostmyself on Jan 13, 2012 17:35:35 GMT -5
There are always going to be silences in a relationship but when you've been with someone for a while, you don't feel so uncomfortable about them. It's just like being around your family, I don't feel so uncomfortable around them when I have nothing to say like I do around most people.
Try to get to know her better, ask her questions about herself, tell her more about you. Like Sexy Spork said, maybe spending some more time together would be a good idea.
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Post by casanova2 on Jan 14, 2012 2:38:13 GMT -5
We do spend quite of bit of time together i usually with her for 4 days.Sometimes recently we can watch tv and hardly say a word to each other.
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Post by Stranger on Jan 14, 2012 13:36:08 GMT -5
Silence? Just make out! ;D My advice would be to sit down with her and talk about your relationship. No doubt she's noticed the silence as well. Whilst trying to find a solution may be the best answer regarding some issues, this isn't one of them. When you're struggling to find things to talk about and there are akward silences, it's usually a sign that something in the relationship has gone astray and you must find time to talk about the relationship. Find the problem and hopefully you'll find the solution. It may just be that you need to spend more time together. I dunno, sitting down and talking about the relationship sounds a bit heavy only 5 months in. I'd just try to find more ways to have fun together - then you'll not only have more to talk about, but you'll feel better about the relationship in general.
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Post by Sexy Spork #37 on Jan 14, 2012 14:44:09 GMT -5
^ Yeah, definitely take anyone's advice but mine. As I say, I've never had a girlfriend so anything I say is probably nonsense. I'll shut up.
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Post by casanova2 on Jan 17, 2012 13:58:14 GMT -5
I feel i have let it cause me severe anxiety worrying about it as i in love with this girl. I have upped my meds.
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Post by lostmyself on Jan 19, 2012 9:36:05 GMT -5
Try watching something together that you can talk about or debate afterwards. You can talk about what's been happening in the news recently, ask her what she feels about big issues, find out about her interests and discuss them or discuss your interests, like Stranger said if you go on trips or do things together you can talk about that.
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Post by casanova2 on Jan 20, 2012 2:34:49 GMT -5
I will try but i think things have taken a turn for the worse.She called me boring last night and said things like she looks for things like making her laugh and i don't do that.And that i talk about the same things.
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Post by casanova2 on Jan 20, 2012 2:36:44 GMT -5
And we had uncomfortable silence on phone last night.
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Post by Stranger on Jan 22, 2012 15:11:17 GMT -5
What sort of things do you do together? Do you go out places much? I find the more experiences you have out and about, the more things you'll encounter that will be fun to reflect on, or lead to other conversations.
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Post by casanova2 on Jan 28, 2012 13:01:12 GMT -5
We didn't get out much once she stopped my drinking.And she was short of cash. Don't matter now we have split up and i feel quite hurt.
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Post by casanova2 on Jan 30, 2012 4:08:20 GMT -5
Does anybody think sending her flowers a good idea?as she won't communicate with me nomore.
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