Random Quote Thread

[theinfiniteabyss84]

Kramer: "Look at her. This is a lonely woman looking for companionship. A spinster... Maybe a virgin. Maybe she got hurt a long time ago. She's a schoolgirl, there was a boy, it didn't work out. So now she needs a little tenderness. She needs a little understanding. Needs a little Kramer."

Jerry: "Then she'll need a little shot of penicillin."

~~~~~~~~

Kramer: "You know if the pig man had a car, he would give you a ride."

~~~~~~~~

Jerry: You wouldn't it broccoli even if it was deep fried in chocolate.
Newman: What? I love broccoli.
Jerry: Oh yeah? Taste.
[Newman tastes the broccoli and spits it up]
Newman: Vile weed.

~~~~~~~~

Kramer: "Yeah. Assman, Jerry. I'm Cosmo Kramer, the Assman!"


~i.a.

[Paulinus]

Some nonsensical ramblings words of wisdom from the King of All Cosmos in the Katamari Damacy games:


"We broke it. Yes, we were naughty. Completely naughty. So, so very sorry. But just between you and us, it felt quite good. "

"Checkbook - people either smile or cry when they read this. It must be a very good novel. "

"Soccer Player - professional at playing with balls. This must be a very valuable Earthling skill, considering his salary"

"This sky is not pretty at all. It's rough and masculine. Possibly sweaty. "

"Peach — A butt-shaped fruit that is more tasty than butts."

"Display Stand — You can put anything you like here, except naughty things."

"Handcuffs — If you do something really bad these may be used on you! Or if you are good..."

"Fire Hazard Sign — This warns people about fire. This can be burnt by fire as well."

"Yesterday, before afternoon tea,
the lovely Queen scolded Us.
About the way we folded laundry.
When thing like that happen, We like to sing."

[skyhint]

paulthequiet said:

Some nonsensical ramblings words of wisdom from the King of All Cosmos in the Katamari Damacy games:


"We broke it. Yes, we were naughty. Completely naughty. So, so very sorry. But just between you and us, it felt quite good. "

"Checkbook - people either smile or cry when they read this. It must be a very good novel. "

"Soccer Player - professional at playing with balls. This must be a very valuable Earthling skill, considering his salary"

"This sky is not pretty at all. It's rough and masculine. Possibly sweaty. "

"Peach — A butt-shaped fruit that is more tasty than butts."

"Display Stand — You can put anything you like here, except naughty things."

"Handcuffs — If you do something really bad these may be used on you! Or if you are good..."

"Fire Hazard Sign — This warns people about fire. This can be burnt by fire as well."

"Yesterday, before afternoon tea,
the lovely Queen scolded Us.
About the way we folded laundry.
When thing like that happen, We like to sing."

All your base are belong to us?

[annaa]

Here are a few of my favourites.
(Some may have already been said, i'm not sure, as I haven't looked at the whole thread yet).

*With some people solitariness is an escape not from others but from themselves.
For they see in the eyes of others only a reflection of themselves.

*When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.

*My way of joking is to tell the truth. It is the funniest joke in the world.

*Treat your mind like a bad neighborhood - don't go there alone.

[Paulinus]

skyhint said:

All your base are belong to us?

What you say!!

[skyhint]

paulthequiet said:

skyhint said:

All your base are belong to us?

What you say!!

You are on the way to destruction. You have no chance to survive make your time. HA HA HA!

[Stranger]

Ever wonder why missiles don't always hit their target?...

[albetross]

"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.”
Frank Sinatra

“Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.”
Frank Sinatra

[Sweet Pea]

"All paid jobs absorb and degrade the mind."

~ Aristotle

[annaa]

Some quotes from Stephen Fry:

What do British Gas and a pelican have in common? They can both stick their bills up thier ass.

Christmas to a child is the first terrible proof that to travel hopefully is better than to arrive

I think animal testing is cruel. They get nervous and get all the answers wrong.

I don't need you to remind me of my age. I have a bladder to do that for me.

You can't reason yourself back into cheerfulness any more than you can reason yourself into an extra six inches in height.

I don't watch television, I think it destroys the art of talking about oneself.

[Sweet Pea]

"A house is made with walls and beams; a home is built with love and dreams."

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

[marty]

I forget where I read this one: "you know you're having a bad day when your phone bill arrives in a box instead of an envelope".

[xanadu]

marty said:

I forget where I read this one: "you know you're having a bad day when your phone bill arrives in a box instead of an envelope".

I don't get it.

[Richard Cunningham]

marty said:

I forget where I read this one: "you know you're having a bad day when your phone bill arrives in a box instead of an envelope".

Having a phone bill with more pages than the phone book would be a worry.

Probably means you have living teenagers in the house.

[marty]

richardcunningham said:

marty said:

I forget where I read this one: "you know you're having a bad day when your phone bill arrives in a box instead of an envelope".

Having a phone bill with more pages than the phone book would be a worry.

Probably means you have living teenagers in the house.

It means either you need to stop spending so much time on the phone, or else have law enforcement do something about whoever's been hijacking your phone line!

I thought of another quote... something Mahatma Gandhi said, when someone asked him what he thought of Western civilization. Gandhi's reply: "I think it would be a great idea".
And here we thought he was nothing more than a little bald guy who helped India gain its independence...