So Nothing can be done and just accept people call

[jkygogo]

I keep reading and keep experiencing people being told their too quiet or too shy and just talking about it. So nothing can be done for us and we just have to accept these insensitive comments directed towards us? Maybe we should be honest wherever we work or are and just say out front that it may surprising but don't be surprised if we are too quiet when around us so they'll know what to expect. Because I think the shock and hurt of this is the fact that you may not expect to be commented on by others, but then are you. And it really really hurts when they say this. But maybe if we tell them or others what to expect concerning us, maybe they'll be a little more sensitive and not say out loud that "you're too quiet" or "you're too shy." Maybe pure honestly will save us hurt and pain down the line. What do you people think?
Also, is there anything that can be done to make others out there what shy people think or feel when they are told "You're too Quiet or too shy?" Is there any publick announcements like they do on NBC or elsewhere telling or informing others how people feel when they say certain things? I mean can't a shy organization or other organization make people aware how politically incorrect or insensitive it is to say to a person "You're too quiet or too shy". I mean can't something be done to raise and make people aware out there about shy people's feelings? Some sort of public announcement to make others aware of this? I mean I think because we're so shy and therefore don't take action to let others know how this issue hurts us and so don't take action while other more self confident organizations or causes are able to get this information out through the media. Can something be done? I mean shy and quiet people are just as good as anyone else.

Thanks.

[CaryGrant]

This topic comes up here frequently, and I think one of the reasons being told "You're too quiet" bothers shy people so much is that...it's true and we know it. We don't want to be that quiet.

I find I am only quiet now in new groups, which is normal as the "new guy," or in groups where my values and personality don't mesh with those of the group, as in party animals. In the first case, I generally thank the person for noticing and say I am just trying to get the feel of the group, because I don't know how they do things. This invariably gets positive and usually helpful responses. In the second, party, case, I say "I know," and either try and find another quiet person to talk to or leave as soon as possible! Why stay if I don't fit and don't want to fit in?

I used to be "too quiet" even one-on-one with someone I didn't know well, but I learned to ask questions - and listen to the responses (to both understand the person and get data for more questions) - and that solved that! And you know what - some individuals I really don't fit with either - so I don't spend a lot of time with them or feel guilty about it or apologise for it. Examples of people I don't fit with would be VERY self-centered people, or those who try to manipulate me, or extremely materialistic people. I try to get to know someone enough to make this call, though, and not make snap judgements which really serve to insulate me from people who are different from me.

[Low]

unfortunately us shy people are an ignored group of people and they are many of us. some of us handle it by becoming more introverted when it is pointed out that we are shy, some have forced themselves to act out to detract from their shyness, others use drugs and alcohol to compensate for their deficits. look at all these 'celebrities'. a good majority of them are shy and turn to drugs or alcohol to numb the pain. It's amazing that people who like to point out that you are quiet have some physical attribute that could really use an extreme makeover, but we never point that out to them. maybe we should.
I think the key to overcoming shyness is finding out about yourself, what situation makes you shy, what situations make you want to flee, what comments make you feel less than zero and come up with positives to counteract them. i always think about the guy from SNL, i forget his name, he would look in the mirror and say, I like me, I am beautiful, I am worthy etc. maybe silly to do but necessary to counteract all the negativity we receive whether imagined or real and stop hating ourselves because we are shy and don't want to be. because it's who we are.
just my thoughts

[HAZE]

if someone says your to quite, tell them they talk to loud and you dont undertsand them anyway