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Post by canisay182 on Jun 23, 2004 23:54:39 GMT -5
ok i really need help. im dating this great guy that i really like, but we have one really big problem thats messing everything up. a couple weeks ago he went on vacation and he would call me every day. every time we talked on the phone we could never think of anyhthing to talk about and it was really akward. after he came back everything got really bad. now its almost impossible for us to even talk to each other. hes on vacation again now and he still calls me every day. i think that if we find something to talk about everything might go back to the way that it used to be. if anyone has any ideas please help me because hes going to call me again tomorrow. HELP!!!!!  |
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Post by sushiboat on Jun 24, 2004 0:22:12 GMT -5
You might want to carry around a small notebook. Any time you do something, see something, have an interesting thought, etc., write down a short note. When you are on the phone, you can refer to your notebook and talk about your day. You can also ask about him and his day.
Remember, there are really only two topics in a conversation -- you and the other person. Even when you are talking about something else, it is always your perspective on something else, or the other person's perspective on something else. Therefore, the better prepared you are to talk about yourself and to ask about the other person, the better you will do in conversation.
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Post by Boblouie58 on Jun 24, 2004 2:35:45 GMT -5
Sushi that was a great reply to bluheart.  Blu- small talk is just that...small things to say to each other. Since he is such a new b/f you probably don't have a lot in common to talk about yet, so ask him how his day is, how the weather is, what he does during the day, that you miss being with him, etc. Try and make him wish he was home with you. Ask questions as much about him and how he is doing or what he is doing while on vacation.  Be cool.  Remember, small talk..don't try and get into long talking sessions if neither of you have much to say. Leaving some details until the next day allows for more to talk about each next day. Good luck.  |
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Post by HonestRepliesss on Jun 24, 2004 7:53:46 GMT -5
Why would you go out with someone who you can hardly even hold a conversation with? I wouldn't even be friends with someone I couldn't hold a conversation with, especially after a couple of weeks have passed and we still haven't gotten anywhere.
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Post by shosho on Jun 24, 2004 8:53:11 GMT -5
I think its nice he calls you every day, even if you both dont say much. He must certainly be interested in you. Is he shy too? maybe thats why he's not saying much. Sometimes its hard to talk on the phone with anyone. You could make small talk like ask what he did or will be doing today, what is the weather like or you could even remark on current events in the news. You could ask him if he took any pictures and hint you would like to see them when he comes back home.
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Post by canisay182 on Jun 24, 2004 12:25:49 GMT -5
hi guys thanks for all the replies! i made a big list of stuff for us to talk about when he calls today, so hopefully everything will be alright. and honest replies, i probably should have said this earlier. before he went on vacation we talked all the time and always had a great time together, it was just the phone thing that was making it hard. good advice though. thanks again everyone. ill give you an update after we talk today. ;D
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Post by Alecto on Jun 24, 2004 18:22:09 GMT -5
Good luck with everything ;D
Its difficult with me talk with my boyfriend on the phone also.. So I know what its like
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Post by canisay182 on Jun 24, 2004 19:34:55 GMT -5
well, we talked again today. it was better than last time, but we still didnt have to much to talk about. hopefully it will keep getting better. i think one of the problems is that sometimes i dont exactly know what hes saying. i know that sounds a little strange, but hes from australia so he has a really heavy accent. he thinks that i have an accent too, so with both of our accents and having really bad reception its hard for us to hear what the other person is saying. thanks for all the suggestions though.  |
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l0ner
Junior Member
Posts: 68
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Post by l0ner on Jun 25, 2004 1:10:40 GMT -5
Here's a sollution (forgive my possible bad spellign singce i've had a litle to drink), but maybe hse should stop calling??? every day?s I realyl don't tink it's normal that a guy wouold call his girl friend *every day* when on vacation, i really don't. why call up when you have snothing to say? don't do it just because of formality....call when you want to call, talk when you want to tlak.
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Post by sushiboat on Jun 25, 2004 7:40:33 GMT -5
bluheart, keep it up.  Talking on the phone is a skill, and the more you do it, the better you will become. It will have benefits beyond your relationship. |
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Blu- small talk is just that...small things to say to each other. Since he is such a new b/f you probably don't have a lot in common to talk about yet, so ask him how his day is, how the weather is, what he does during the day, that you miss being with him, etc. Try and make him wish he was home with you. Ask questions as much about him and how he is doing or what he is doing while on vacation. 
Talking on the phone is a skill, and the more you do it, the better you will become. It will have benefits beyond your relationship.