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Post by Jake on Aug 20, 2004 17:32:47 GMT -5
Is it true that girls only go for those confident macho James Bond-type guys who don't care what anyone thinks? From my own experience it seems that the guys who are loud and unashamed seem to attract the most girls.
I have hardly ever met any girls who find low self-esteem and shyness a turn-on.
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Post by canisay182 on Aug 20, 2004 22:11:58 GMT -5
i cant speak for everyone but i dont like guys like that. i think that its kinda cute when guys are shy. almost any guy who isnt shy really intimidates me and i hate spending time with them. id have to say that shy guys are soooo much better and more attractive than those "confident macho james bond guys".
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Post by Kitten on Aug 20, 2004 23:11:22 GMT -5
Hmm. While I'd say that low self-esteem isn't exactly a turn on, I do realize that everyone has their insecurities and to me, it's much sexier if a guy will admit to them than trying to act all tough and macho. The whole macho frat-boy thing just doesn't do it for me. Confidence, yes, but it's not an absolute must. I like guys who are "real", not trying to be something they're not.
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Post by Sweet Pea on Aug 21, 2004 3:54:11 GMT -5
What they said. There's nothing I hate more than a guy who thinks he's God's Gift to women! And bragging...yuck! A little humility goes a long way in my estimation. Everyone has some self-doubt, and I think it takes more strength to own up to it and keep on forging ahead in spite of it than it does to run around pretending it's not there. And shyness is a BIG turnon for me, especially if it makes a man nervous around you and you know it's cuz he finds you attractive.  |
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Post by sushiboat on Aug 21, 2004 7:45:11 GMT -5
Is it true that girls only go for those confident macho James Bond-type guys who don't care what anyone thinks? From my own experience it seems that the guys who are loud and unashamed seem to attract the most girls. I have hardly ever met any girls who find low self-esteem and shyness a turn-on. If you find someone who likes you for having low self-esteem, run. There's a difference between accepting a flaw and liking it. A woman who is looking for low self-esteem guys is going to have her own major problems, or worse, she is taking advantage of them. As for shyness, some women find it endearing. But then ask those women how many shy guys they dated. Are they taking the initiative, asking the guy out, and moving things forward at every stage? I think there are very few women who do that. You may or may not always be shy, but you should find some way to get past your inhibitions and go for what you want, in spite of your fears and insecurities. |
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Post by Reflection on Aug 21, 2004 19:15:11 GMT -5
I can't speak for all girls, but I like guys that are somewhere in the middle on the spectrum between extreme shyness and extreme loudness. I don't like the macho James Bond-type guys who are obnoxious and moronic, nor do I like very shy guys who hardly talk. Anyone who finds low self-esteem a turn-on is probably looking to take advantage of that person. That's my opinion, anyway.
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Cactus
Junior Member
Posts: 75
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Post by Cactus on Aug 23, 2004 22:45:13 GMT -5
I find that guys who let the whole world know what they think of themselves (that they're great!) are a big turn-off. To be perfectly honest, there are some really nice, attractive, confident guys out there, but they're usually already in relationships or they aren't looking to get into one. That's a turn-off too! The shy guys who "sit in the corner" and don't say much  are often the ones I find the most interesting. Not because I want to take advantage of them, but because I wonder what they must be thinking about or paying attention to or any number of things. Often, the quiet ones seem really calm and peaceful (although, I'm sure there's anxiety galore under the surface. I know, I've been there....many times). I find that attractive. I also believe that many (perhaps not all) shy guys have a well developed capacity for empathy. I'm a "feelings" type of person and anyone who can understand that and share my emotional moments in a supportive "I've been there" kind of way will win me over any day. I'm a fairly gentle person and that's one of the things I look for in a guy too. Many of the best things about people aren't evident right off the bat. You have to look beneath the surface to find the outstanding qualities. If it takes awhile to get to know a shy guy because he's shy, I say....bring it on! I'm sure the wait would be well worth it.  |
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are often the ones I find the most interesting. Not because I want to take advantage of them, but because I wonder what they must be thinking about or paying attention to or any number of things. Often, the quiet ones seem really calm and peaceful (although, I'm sure there's anxiety galore under the surface. I know, I've been there....many times). I find that attractive. I also believe that many (perhaps not all) shy guys have a well developed capacity for empathy. I'm a "feelings" type of person and anyone who can understand that and share my emotional moments in a supportive "I've been there" kind of way will win me over any day. I'm a fairly gentle person and that's one of the things I look for in a guy too. Many of the best things about people aren't evident right off the bat. You have to look beneath the surface to find the outstanding qualities. If it takes awhile to get to know a shy guy because he's shy, I say....bring it on! I'm sure the wait would be well worth it. 