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Post by ali on Mar 9, 2003 16:01:21 GMT -5
The hardest part of being shy, for me, is the isolation and lonliness. This weekend has been typical. I haven't left my house for two days and it is horrible. Lonliness is terrible. I wish I had somebody to love and to love me. Is that too much to ask? Obviously it is. What is the hardest part of being shy for you all?
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Paul
New Member
Posts: 11
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Post by Paul on Mar 9, 2003 22:30:21 GMT -5
One of the hardest parts of bieng shy for me is seeing all arounf me people who have friends and social lives and feeling like i will never have that for myself.
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Post by deep slush on Mar 10, 2003 1:20:39 GMT -5
I think the hardest part about being shy is when you have to face up to those you've touched in the past. I've been asked to do the catering at a triple wedding (date undetermined) and the suspense gets me anxious. Why? They are people who I haven't seen in 10 years, all of which were at one time friends. I was never real friendly though, mostly because of my shy style. They've all moved on and became something, and I haven't done much with my life besides shuffle from job to job and delusion to delusion. In my old age, I'm even beginning to doubt that my recipes will be something that can make them say *yummy*. I just hope they've forgotten about all the albums I have borrowed and lost. I'm seriously pondering a disguise. I'm not Italian, but I'm sure I could at least glue on a mustache and stay in the back of the kitchen. These days everyone wants to go back and thank the chef though. Either way you bake it, I am toast. I understand what you're saying. I think it's that feeling that we'll never be accepted that keeps us lonely and isolated. I really don't like to speak out cause I know I'm crazy, and something I say is liable to offend or just fly over. Still, it's a tiny soft voice that should find you one day, and make you loved. Good luck. Do you think anyone has ever not liked you because you are shy? and hey
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Post by unionjackattack86 on Mar 10, 2003 17:42:23 GMT -5
probably lonliness, you do get used to it but its difficult sometimes. I'm just glad I have the internet as it gives me a chance to talk to people, if I didn't have the internet id dread to think what my life would be like; sad but true.
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Post by Valerie on Mar 11, 2003 16:28:09 GMT -5
I know this sounds stupid and you've heard it a million times before~but you have to love yourself before anyone will love you.
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Post by Stewpot on Mar 12, 2003 12:28:02 GMT -5
Even though you feel alone remember your mind can take you anywhere you want.
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Post by unionjackattack86 on Mar 12, 2003 14:38:47 GMT -5
I see what you mean stewpot, being alone gives you alot of time to think about things
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Post by NewOrleansLady on Mar 17, 2003 2:42:01 GMT -5
The hardest part for me is not being able to speak up for myself. I don't take a lot of crap from people but, instead of telling them how I feel and standing up for myself, I would just avoid them anyway possible. I just wish that I wasn't so timid. I'm not saying that I want to be a bitch, I just want to be strong enough to not get walked on.
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Post by unionjackattack86 on Mar 17, 2003 5:14:31 GMT -5
i'm the same I don't often stand up to people, if someone says something nasty to me I usually ignore it and avoid bothering with them in the future, I did quite well the other week though because we were working with the groundwork trust volunteers in some woods with college, and one lad out of our group refused to work and I tryed persuading him to work as his reasons for not working were pathetic and he was making the group look bad. He still wouldn't work though and was whinging [moaning] all the time and started having a go at me for trying to get him to work so I told him to **** off to somewhere else and moan as I didn't want to hear him moaning whilst I was working; which is quite good for me as normally I would keep myself to myself but he was really winding me up as he wouldn't stop moaning. He didn't though so I just continued working and ignored him, he walked out of college a week later anyway and spends his days in the pub now.
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Post by Michael1973 on Mar 17, 2003 13:59:17 GMT -5
I'm going to have to agree with the poster who said the worst thing is being surrounded by people with busy, active social/romantic lives. It seems everyone I know is so busy running from one social activity to the next, or spending time with a significant other, that they have no free time left over. I'm not saying I want to be THAT busy, but it's hard to accept my situation when I'm faced with constant reminders of how different I really am.
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Post by unionjackattack86 on Mar 17, 2003 15:12:05 GMT -5
Yeah it is hard when you see other people with partners and their friends and stuff, particulary on Valentine's day, someone once said we should have a single's day, I think thats a great idea ;D
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Post by rosiekins on Mar 21, 2003 12:29:09 GMT -5
The hardest part for me is not being able to speak up for myself. I don't take a lot of crap from people but, instead of telling them how I feel and standing up for myself, I would just avoid them anyway possible. I just wish that I wasn't so timid. I'm not saying that I want to be a pregnant dog, I just want to be strong enough to not get walked on. I completely agree with this, which brings me to my main quibble; BEING TREATED LIKE I'M STUPID. "HI, ROSIE. CAN. YOU. HEAR. ME?" Haha. Okay, no one has actually ever said that, but they may as well.
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Post by urbanspaceman on Mar 27, 2003 13:21:56 GMT -5
A hard thing for me is seeing friends moving on in their own lives, and changing as people, whereas I see myself as not having changed a lot really. Relationships tend to be the worst thing tho, where friends go from one girlfriend to the next, I'm still pretty much inept in that department.
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Post by moogle on Apr 14, 2003 12:19:36 GMT -5
i think the hardest part is the fact that i don't have friends. i have a boyfriend, but there are just some things i can't talk to him about...like him. i have a couple of penpals, and one or two people online that i talk to, but i don't have anyone that i can talk to about personal things, like how i really feel, or someone that will be a shoulder to cry on when my depression gets very bad. my ex-boyfriends were always wonderful friends. it was ok that when i we were together, i didn't have any other friends, but my current boyfriend isn't like that anymore. we're always at odds with each other, and i don't have anyone that can help me.
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Post by spitzig on Apr 15, 2003 3:42:37 GMT -5
Just general lonliness. It's worse with dating, because that means I not only don't have many friends(anyone I'd date would be a good friend), but I also am missing out on the whole love/romance thing.
But, yeah, it's rough not knowing anyone well enough to talk about my depression. And, the few people I DO know well enough, would worry about me because of it. Those would only be my mother, who worries about everything. And, an ex-girlfriend, who I stopped telling when she said that she worried about me. My depression is my problem. When someone else is worrying about it, I'm making it their problem, too.
I've talked to a couple other people about it, but just when I was really drunk. Or, therapists. I lost my job, and I don't have insurance now, so I can't afford sanity.
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