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Post by Twice-Shy on Jun 10, 2003 3:21:22 GMT -5
What do you dread most in life? The thing I dread most is walking past or driving past my ex-wfe and kids and her new boyfriend.
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Post by urbanspaceman on Jun 10, 2003 5:02:08 GMT -5
Losing my hair. And it's already started, arrrgghhh! Oh, and for some reason, bumping into people that I know in the street, but not that well (if that makes sense). Like people I used to work with but didn't really speak that much to (basically everyone). I feel my face burning up, should I say hello? Or just walk on past them? There's the really awkward moment when you go past them. Well, awkward for me anyway. I've just read that back, and it sounds stupid. But true I think just feeling embarrassed in a very public situation would be a nightmare for me. I do blush extremely easily, and feel very conscious of what I'm doing with my body - start biting my lip, fiddling with my hair (probably why it's falling out!)
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Post by moogle on Jun 10, 2003 6:37:36 GMT -5
running into old college professors. specifically ones that i really screwed up in their class. maybe i'd get lucky and they wouldn't recognize me, but it wasn't that long ago and the average class size was like 12 people. and teachers do remember some amazing things.. a few years ago, my second grade teacher saw my mom at the grocery store and recognized her. anyway, i've already had a high school teacher see me and it was embarrassing because i was working a really crappy job.
one dread that is so great that it's more of a phobia is my fear of someone breaking into my house. it's not as bad right now, but i've lost countless hours of sleep because of it.
i also dread my cats and my mom dying...
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Mildman2 really Mildman1
Guest
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Post by Mildman2 really Mildman1 on Jun 13, 2003 16:11:25 GMT -5
For a number of years I suffered from a form of social phobia (apparently it's something that non-shy people can sometimes suffer from too). My phobia was that I felt anxious and tense around absolutely everyone that I didn't know. I feared leaving the house (although I did) because if I walked past someone on the street I tensed up. In crowds I felt paranoid, and the worst thing of all was waiting in queues, whether in shops, cinemas etc. - I couldn't cope if someone was waiting behind me, felt extremely self-conscious and seemed to be close to panic most of the time in these situations. What made it worse was that I was embarassed about it, and didn't want my family to find out about it (they're still not aware of it). I was also unemployed, and the thought of working among people terrified me.
The thing was, it started when I was about 19, when I'd feel tense in certain situations, although only rarely (and consequently didn't think about it), and developed a little more in my mid 20's, but didn't become a real problem until my late 20's, at which point it seemed to take over (and the fact I was now aware of it made it worse).
I realised I had to do something about it. I visited a counsellor on one occasion, but didn't want to pursue that angle, so I forced myself to gradually confront my phobia in tiny steps.
I decided to visit small shops where it was unlikely that there would be a queue, first of all visiting only one, then as I became more comfortable visiting more than one in one journey. This continued for several months until I felt completely at ease in these places, at which point I felt a sense of achievement. Then I decided to tackle the busier places, the larger shops and cinemas, where there were likely to be a large number of people, but not at first being able to stand in a queue with other people behind me, just acclimatising myself to being around a lot of people. Eventually, I tested myself in a queue, and although initially petrified I was eventually able to get used to them, and am now at the point where I don't give it a second thought. I am now comfortable (i.e relaxed, not self-conscious) around large numbers of people in almost all situations, but sometimes still feel tense in say, a crowded restaurant (I tend to sit with my back to the wall). A lot of credit must go to my ex-girlfriend as she knew about it and supported me through it.
It took a long time for me to overcome my phobia, and until near the end of it, I did think that I would never be able to overcome it, to be as I was when I was younger, shy but not fearful, in these day to day situations. Working, and being around other people, has further relaxed me in public situations, and I obviously hope that my phobia never returns.
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Post by Twice-Shy on Jun 14, 2003 14:08:44 GMT -5
Well done MIldman. You should be very proud of yourself. And well done your girlfriend for her tremendous support.
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Post by NewOrleansLady on Jun 16, 2003 0:24:13 GMT -5
For being shy, I'm a pretty versitile person. I can't really think of anything that I would dread. Except, I would dread it if my son grew up to be a drug addict . I've always had a fear of drugs, legal or not. Anything that really messes with your head scares me.
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Post by inkysoftwhispers on Jun 16, 2003 15:34:45 GMT -5
I really dread having to give a speech or do anything infront of an audience,even if I'm amongst a big choir or something where no-one's really going to notice me. Or having to answer a question in a seminar.
Pretty boring thing to dread...my flatmate has a phobia of lattice pies. Apparently it's something to do with 'the intricacy'...
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Tiff
Junior Member
25-year old Administrative Assistant who crochets and knits!
Posts: 80
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Post by Tiff on Jun 16, 2003 20:33:21 GMT -5
Hi,
Well if it's in relation to being shy....
I dread that I won't be able to date as much and not allowing men to get to know me better. I shut myself off..if I feel someone is getting too close to me and like I turtle..if it's threatening..I will push myself back into my safe hard shell.
But I am day by day working through this..
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Post by Mildman1 on Jun 20, 2003 14:29:40 GMT -5
Well done MIldman. You should be very proud of yourself. And well done your girlfriend for her tremendous support. Recently had a hairy moment. Had to go to church for a special family occasion (hadn't been for years). At one point I and my sister had to go to the altar. I became extremely self- conscious and while up there thought I was going to have a panic attack. Fortunately I didn't - that would have been really embarassing and would have increased my fear of such situations.
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Post by inkysoftwhispers on Jun 20, 2003 16:54:37 GMT -5
Oh I hate going up for communion. I get really stupidly afraid that I'll spill the wine or trip over. Argh. Wish I went to church more often actually. I love the atmosphere in some of them -especially the huge cathedrals...can be so peaceful.
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Post by NewOrleansLady on Jun 21, 2003 0:12:50 GMT -5
.my flatmate has a phobia of lattice pies. Apparently it's something to do with 'the intricacy'... LOL WTF? ;D That's funny. I'm afraid to walk under/near anything large that has an engine. There's a Naval museaum in Florida that I have been too many times. It has jets hanging from the ceiling as well as sitting on the floor and I have to sit in the lobby while whoever I go with tours the place. Heavy planes shouldn't be hanging from the ceiling. The ones on the ground are so big and pointy, it's intimidating. But, I can't walk behind them either, I keep picturing flames shooting out at me. I have been on a few cruises too and a few times, because of how the ship is docked, I had to walk in front of it to get to the city and I could feel my knees buckling as I walked by. And, I am afraid that the life boats on the lifeboat deck will fall on top of me. I know, I'm a loon.
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Post by moogle on Jun 21, 2003 9:22:34 GMT -5
i dread my birthdays..
also, whenever i'm a passenger on the highway, and we pass a truck, i get images in my head of one of the truck's wheels popping off and hitting the car. it's not a fear, i mostly just sit there staring, expecting it to happen.
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Post by serenity on Jul 8, 2003 19:32:36 GMT -5
What to say... I do not know Sometimes I do but my mouth won't go
Mouth slightly open but no words are spoken
2 eyes glaring at me Haven't looked but I feel them on me
Please stare away I plead in my head Oh, these are the moments I do so dread
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Post by smiley1076 on Jul 8, 2003 22:20:37 GMT -5
I dread somebody I have to be around alot like a co-worker will find out something that changes in their mind the way they think of me and they will start to dislike me or despise me. I'd rather people not know me than to know me and not like me.
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Post by Twice-Shy on Jul 9, 2003 6:50:01 GMT -5
It really is amazing how much in common we all have on this one. The thing we seem to dread is how we are perceiced by others. We dread coming across or being seen to be a fool.
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