HAZE went out today

[HAZE]

hey people, good to see your all still here,
as a few of you know i dont get out much and just keep busy around the house. but today my dad asked me to go to the supermarket with him, i said maybe. this might not seen a big deal to some of you but a havn't been for about a year, since the time i thought everyone was watching me. but today i wanted to go, dont get me wrong though there still was that little voice inside that diddn't want to but i seen a book called something like "feel the fear and do it anyway" so that what i done. got in the car a went. i knew i couldnt not go then. but i was ok, butterflys in the stomoch and all that but fine. when we got in knowone was watching me my dad really understool what it was like and kept me talking which was nice. but for about the first 15-20 mins i still was really tense and felt all juddery if you know what thats like. so i guess i probley looked nervous but everyone was so busy looking at all the discounts and rejects they never noticed. there was a fair few mean looking people their but the only people i touched eyes with was a couple of foxy ladies, though i think the just liked my clothes. anyway it was not liked i thought it would be, i diddnt get stared at or jocked about and im going to go next time too. and yesterday i took my dog round the park by myself, even if it was in the dark.
so people stay cool and keep alook out for my hym of the week****peace*****
= HAZE=

[Sanity FreeZ0ne]

Congrats.
That's pretty cool you were able to face and even overcome to some extent your fear. Sounds like your making pretty good progress. Keep at it.

[HAZE]

today i sent off a letter to apply for the job of my dreams as a gardener for some holiday cottages in north wales. so if i get it theres no turning back now, but i should be alright cos they have the internet there so i can keep intouch with all you guys.
and yesterday i went ON MY OWN to the local chinese grocers and bought stuff for my tea and i had a short conversation with the nice checkout girl.

laters
HAZE of uk

[glenn miller]

congrats. i have a hard time getting jobs. i am looking at a couple now.

[HAZE]

so i guess they all seen something in me they liked.......... yes i got the job and get this..out of 40 other applicants who even had the relevant qualifications and on top of being gardener they would like me to be the house cook.
this is still kinda unreal for me because not very long ago i was extreamly upset with how i thought my life was going to be forever. but since sending off the application letter iv been much happyer and even meet up to talk to some friends regulary.
this is my chance to be who id want to be and im not going to let my mind stop me. il have every thing il need there to live a very healthy and happy life and the people im sure are some of the nicest around. plus il be meeting lots of like minded people all the time because they have some kind of volunteer system that brings people there from all over the world. when i was at the 24 hour long interview there was a girl there who lived near Niagara Falls...how cool?
so yea..its all good here and as i type my mountain bike is in the shop being prepared for the mountains.
okay so i talk to youa'll soon

HAZE of uk

[Ghost]

See? You don't have to be all bubbly and loud mouthed to get a job .

Way to go!

[Alecto]

Wow, congrats on getting the job ;D. Thats good news