Post by VictorH on Feb 6, 2005 14:44:19 GMT -5
Another day with more thoughts pouring into my brain. I had just arrived home on a long quiet trip from the countryside after a relaxing weekend. Although, I really should've been relaxing when I could've worked more on my project which will be due tommorow (what a pain).
Anyways, I think its a very good thing to be posting on this site as often as you can. Its a good idea to express yourself to the fullest. Even if it means a flammer will come here and try to ruin my life. I shouldn't care because people like that shouldn't go around saying shit about other people (I just read up about that). They wouldn't understand anyways, and if they did understand, then they should be ashamed of what they do for a living. I'd rather be myself then to act like those kind of people who do not consider the things they say and how it will affect other peoples feelings. (My apologies for being in an offensive mood but I am just being passionate and standing up for something I truly believe in, so don't mind me).
What is being myself? is a question I sometimes ask. Well, were born with the opportunity and chance to choose whoever we want to be. We only take the things off other people that we truly think would best fit into description. Like a puzzle piece. But, the thing that really holds me back is when I believe that I am doing something weird. I spoke with a psychologist at my school once and that person once asked me. What is weird? I said different. But, then in my head I asked myself another question... what is different? Isn't everybody different. Its funny how I hear that all the time and yet it doesn't affect me/us/everyone in any other way.
I feel like whatever I say today, in this post will mean nearly nothing in comparison to my other posts. That is just an instictive feeling. Although, I'll continue posting and see where I am led.
[Just a thought]
I wonder why everyday when we wake up were in a different mood? Is it because when we go to sleep and move into REM stage(Dreaming Stage) it pulls us through an entire field of different emotions encrypted with symbolic meanings? *even though we sometimes we say we dont have dreams, its just we can't remember them. If we can't remember them then how do we know we ever had them in the first place?* Well anyhow, I'm just thinking and making up stuff in my head as I go along. But, dreams play an important role in our lives. It tells us what our subconscious knows about us and how we feel since we don't always know why we feel a certain way. For example One time I had a dream where I met actors. Another time I had a dream where there was a big screen T.V. and I was in hell. Another time I was running through streets in my past memories and eventually ran into a theatre. I noticed that all these things like T.V. sets or Threatres. They all involved the media telling me that my subconscious wanted me to get involved. I found this really neat dream dictionary on the net if anyone is interested: www.soulfuture.com/dream_dictionary/dream_dictionary_index_a.asp
[End of thought]
I think after every post on this site I feel alot more calm and different (in a good way). Now, that I think of it, I think having the opportunity to let go of whatever emotions are embedded in you is a very relaxing feeling (Yeah, Yeah i'm weird ok). Whether they are small emotions or big ones. Regardless, I find myself holding them inside me alot of the times or keeping them to myself. But, I remember that, they are still emotions that eventually accumulate inside. But, what of it? Well sometimes I know when I distanced myself from the world for so long. I act polite to people. I always obey the rules (yet there are those around me, breaking them). I question myself how come I am stuck doing the model citizen type things and other people are doing the opposite. It isn't fair, but I don't want to be that way. distancing myself from people became a bad habbit and I felt very bitter inside with hatred for everything just because of how I treated myself.
Anyways.... so I guess if I keep posting here i'll either get over this shyness or eventually run out of things to say. Meaning I'll stop saying things that make no sense lol.
(If any of you admins or moderators are reading this. I forgot to say thanks for having such a great site.) (Oh, yeah another thanks that goes out to the community too)
Later,
Vic
Anyways, I think its a very good thing to be posting on this site as often as you can. Its a good idea to express yourself to the fullest. Even if it means a flammer will come here and try to ruin my life. I shouldn't care because people like that shouldn't go around saying shit about other people (I just read up about that). They wouldn't understand anyways, and if they did understand, then they should be ashamed of what they do for a living. I'd rather be myself then to act like those kind of people who do not consider the things they say and how it will affect other peoples feelings. (My apologies for being in an offensive mood but I am just being passionate and standing up for something I truly believe in, so don't mind me).
What is being myself? is a question I sometimes ask. Well, were born with the opportunity and chance to choose whoever we want to be. We only take the things off other people that we truly think would best fit into description. Like a puzzle piece. But, the thing that really holds me back is when I believe that I am doing something weird. I spoke with a psychologist at my school once and that person once asked me. What is weird? I said different. But, then in my head I asked myself another question... what is different? Isn't everybody different. Its funny how I hear that all the time and yet it doesn't affect me/us/everyone in any other way.
I feel like whatever I say today, in this post will mean nearly nothing in comparison to my other posts. That is just an instictive feeling. Although, I'll continue posting and see where I am led.
[Just a thought]
I wonder why everyday when we wake up were in a different mood? Is it because when we go to sleep and move into REM stage(Dreaming Stage) it pulls us through an entire field of different emotions encrypted with symbolic meanings? *even though we sometimes we say we dont have dreams, its just we can't remember them. If we can't remember them then how do we know we ever had them in the first place?* Well anyhow, I'm just thinking and making up stuff in my head as I go along. But, dreams play an important role in our lives. It tells us what our subconscious knows about us and how we feel since we don't always know why we feel a certain way. For example One time I had a dream where I met actors. Another time I had a dream where there was a big screen T.V. and I was in hell. Another time I was running through streets in my past memories and eventually ran into a theatre. I noticed that all these things like T.V. sets or Threatres. They all involved the media telling me that my subconscious wanted me to get involved. I found this really neat dream dictionary on the net if anyone is interested: www.soulfuture.com/dream_dictionary/dream_dictionary_index_a.asp
[End of thought]
I think after every post on this site I feel alot more calm and different (in a good way). Now, that I think of it, I think having the opportunity to let go of whatever emotions are embedded in you is a very relaxing feeling (Yeah, Yeah i'm weird ok). Whether they are small emotions or big ones. Regardless, I find myself holding them inside me alot of the times or keeping them to myself. But, I remember that, they are still emotions that eventually accumulate inside. But, what of it? Well sometimes I know when I distanced myself from the world for so long. I act polite to people. I always obey the rules (yet there are those around me, breaking them). I question myself how come I am stuck doing the model citizen type things and other people are doing the opposite. It isn't fair, but I don't want to be that way. distancing myself from people became a bad habbit and I felt very bitter inside with hatred for everything just because of how I treated myself.
Anyways.... so I guess if I keep posting here i'll either get over this shyness or eventually run out of things to say. Meaning I'll stop saying things that make no sense lol.
(If any of you admins or moderators are reading this. I forgot to say thanks for having such a great site.) (Oh, yeah another thanks that goes out to the community too)
Later,
Vic
