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Post by Shyboy1 on Jul 31, 2004 20:49:02 GMT -5
I am forced to work in a group of 3 to 4 people on a major assignment. The lecturer says that we can select our own groups but obviously I won't be able to because i haven't spoken to anybody in the same class. I am too shy to ask people in class to join their group and the whole thought of it makes me really scared.
Anyway, i'll be forced into a group somewhere hopefully but what worries me is that my shyness will prevent me from contributing ideas to the group, because i don't want to give them silly answers which are wrong because it'll make me feel embarrassed and go all red. What can I do???
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Post by strawberrysweetie on Aug 9, 2004 18:22:42 GMT -5
I know exactly how you feel. I hate group work because most people have some friends in the class and can group up together, but if you're alone, then you're afraid of where you will be. I'm usually the last one that needs a group. Then I tell the teacher that I don't have a group, which I feel really stupid for, since I feel like a little kid asking for help. Then when I'm in a group I always feel stupid and don't really contribute much. This really makes me upset, because then I feel like I'm mooching off of them and they're doing all the work. It sucks. So, since I'm the same way, I have no idea as to what you could do. I guess you just have to try not to worry about what they'll think of you. Sorry I can't really help!  |
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Post by DayDreamer on Aug 12, 2004 23:38:45 GMT -5
Yea I can definitely relate with you guys. Out of the groups I've been forced to work with, I've found some people will make you more comfortable than others. We always worry how we look and what we say, it preoccupies us and gets us flustered. Try to focus on your group members and the things discussed, rather than your nervousness. I know that is much easier said than done, but if you try to keep that idea in your subconcious and flow with the ideas and people, it will be a hell of a lot easier. And if you blush, stutter, or feel nervous, ITS ALRIGHT! You are unique and cool for being you. Acting out of the norm doesn't make you an incompetent weirdo. I seek out shy people because we aren't normal, and that's cool. Also, take notice of other people's mannerisms, more time than not, you will notice there is atleast one other quiet person or "more shy" person than you are, sometimes we are to preoccupied we are completely oblivious to everything and everyone. Best advice I can give is read a book about SAD, once you know more about yourself you can take positive steps.
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Post by SpathiEluder on Aug 13, 2004 1:54:11 GMT -5
i despise groupwork in general.
if i get assigned to a group, it's merely a pain in the ass (having to coordinate with other's schedules to have meetings is the worst, and if there's no "leader type" who takes charge it is often very unproductive, since i'm no leader).
having to self-select groups is terrible, since i'm too shy to ask people if i can be in their group, i have to get the professor to assign me to one...
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Post by bella on Aug 21, 2004 0:28:05 GMT -5
I so feel your pain. Group work in college is so dreadful and maybe even worse than in highschool. It's good to learn breathing techniques that'll help you relax in such a situation. It's awful when you have flooding thoughts of anxiety regarding the group work and can't think straight. Try and focus on the project itself and forget about the people around you. Sometimes planning ahead at home is helpful so then you can contribute more easily during groupwork time. Best of luck to you!
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Post by mrgoodtimes on Aug 21, 2004 2:43:30 GMT -5
This is how I handle doing group work or getting people together for group work. I normally handle the situation by trying to be as business minded as possible dude. If you go about asking these people to get together for a group like its a date or something they are going to act like its a they are not interested.On the other hand if you go about getting together for groups with the attitude that you are only interested in completing the task at hand and nothing else, people will not mind working with you because they have the same goal and that is too complete the assignment. If you seem that you are dedicated to completing the assignment and that is your only motive for getting a group together then it will be relatively easy. I do feel your pain people especially young people in college are very aprehensive and tend to think that everyone is hitting on them. Sooooooooo keep it business like. Just pretend your at work or something like that it should be easy enuf
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Post by lonelyheart on Aug 28, 2004 20:09:33 GMT -5
Okay, well i've been paired with a group of guys so anxiety shouldn't be as bad, i'll still feel a bit like an idiot if i suggest stupid ideas though but it's not so bad...
Lonely Heart (shyboy1)
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