Need advice, I feel really bad. Friendship?

[strawberrysweetie]

Okay, so I have like no real friends. I never go out and hang out with people my age outside of school. But, I have a question. Do you think that you can be friends with just anybody or don't you think that you have to have at least some kind of bond or something?

Well, I know that sounds like a really funny (or should I say stupid?) question, but I really need to know what you guys think about this. Also, there's more that goes along with this, so please read.

All right, there's this girl in my home ec. class that (just out of the blue I swear) asked me if I wanted to spend the night on saturday night. And I was just so not expecting that question and was trying to come up with an excuse. When I said I didn't know, she's like, well okay, let me give you my phone number and you can call me, and I said okay (but very quietly). Then she asked for mine, but I didn't really want to give it to her, so I just said that I couldn't give it out to anyone since it was unlisted (lame excuse I know). Then, to top it all off, she said something like, "Will you call me? Please call me, because whenever I give my number out, nobody ever calls me back."

So now I feel really bad because I really don't want to call her or spend the night. I don't even really know her. I've barely talked to her at all, so I don't understand why she wants to hang out with me when she knows nothing about me. She's even asked me my name like three times! She couldn't even remember it when she asked me to spend the night! To tell you the truth, I think she's a bit strange, and I don't think we have much in common. I find her a bit annoying. What should I do? Am I too picky about people? Should I call her, and if so, what should I say?

Please, please, please help me, because I really don't know what to do or how to act around her. I'm nice to her and all, but I just don't think that we could be good friends. Am I just an awful person?, because I feel really bad for feeling this way. Thanks in advance for any replies.

I know I posted this on the general board also, so sorry I posted it twice, but I just want any helpI can get. Plus, I think it's kind of a dilemma.

[C Renee]

I'd stay away from her if you feel uncomfortable around her.

I've had that happen to me before. I was on the bus on the way to school and this girl just started talking to me and gave me her phone number and told me to call her. I'd never experienced that before (from the someone of the same sex). Usually when you make new friends with someone of the same sex it's because you work together or in the same class together in school. It can happen anywhere with strangers, but normally you would start off having a conversation and finding that you have a lot in common. But I'd never had anyone walk up to me and want to be friends with me (like in the public) and give me their phone number. Just from guys--that's all. ;D It was weird, and I never called her.

I guess that is the way some people try to make friends--but it's rare if you ask me. I find it a weird approach and don't really fancy it.

[shy 777]

If she sees you not talking to anyone and you are looking like you have no friends, then maybe she thought you would be easy to make friends with because she has none herself? I used to think that way in elementry school. I would try to make friends with other kids who didn't talk because it was easier.

That situation you had was weird though. Be careful if you do decide to "hang-out" with her on a Saturday night because she might want to be "more than friends" lol. (unless that floats your boat, I ain't here to judge

[strawberrysweetie]

Guest-shy said:

That situation you had was weird though. Be careful if you do decide to "hang-out" with her on a Saturday night because she might want to be "more than friends" lol. (unless that floats your boat, I ain't here to judge

LoL! Well, that would be about the worst situation to be in! Haha...no, I'm not the way...lol. And I sure hope that's not what she meant!

[ShyOne]

just try to get to know her, remember don't judge a book by it's cover.being friends won't hurt, atleast you''ll have someone to talk to. but if she wants to be your girlfriend, and you don't feel comfortable, then decline the offer.
just one questions : how good are her looks (ugly,average,pretty, or attractive)?

if she's anywhere near pretty or attractive, I say go for it, unless you really don't like her.it seems like it's been a couple of weeks since your topic post, please update me on what happened.



good luck

[Some Guy]

I was actually just thinking about this earlier today. I was thinking about it because I just came to the realisation that people naturally blend with people and form friendships with people who are similar to themselves. Ive known all my friends (though theres not that many of them) for years and they are all quite similar to me in one way or another. I also realised that in my classes in school I pretty much got to know all the people who were similar to me by the time I left school and that I never got to know the people who were clearly different.

I think that people who appear quite different to eachother at first glance can become great friends despite their differences, however there is always some kind of smilarity or bond that keeps them friends and helps them get to know eachother. I have been friendly with very confident and popular people who seem very different to me because actually we were quite similar in other ways.

[strawberrysweetie]

Yeah, okay, so I guess I better update this one.

Well...she actually has moved away! She left at the end of last week. (I guess she's in foster care or something...I think) So now I don't have to deal with it anymore...(YES!) I never did end up calling her at all. I never went out and hung out with her at all. But, I'm so happy because she was truly getting on my nerves.

Reasons she got on my nerves:

1. One of the days I had loaned her my calculater. (Only because someone had told me to say no and I didn't want to be rude, and I actually trusted her with it.) I was really skeptical at first, though, because I generally do not trust people with any of my things and letting them take them. But, I loaned it out anyway. I even had to ask, "Why, you don't have a calculator?" and she said no, so I thought I'd be nice and help her out. However, the next day I forgot to ask for it back, and I know I saw her using it that day too. Then I remembered like a day after that and she said that her aunt stole it! Now I have know idea what she meant by that. She must have family problems (well, I guess she must if she's in foster care). But still, you'd think she'd have the decency to keep it in her bookpack so she wouldn't lose it! Or even pay me back for it!

2. She always pestered me for my phone number. She just wouldn't stop and let it go!

3. She burped out loud twice! (the day she left) Okay, maybe that seems kind of weird of me, but I like manners...especially if I don't know you all that well and it was in school. If it was just joking around and we were hanging out and really good friends and having a good time and acting stupid and immature, then fine, but most of the time I like manners.

Hmmm...yeah, so that's that! I am quite relieved that she left...as I think you can tell from what I've written.