Post by Leigh on Jun 10, 2004 16:50:13 GMT -5
I stumbled across this site when I was feeling frustrated about being shy. It seems to me that a lot of people mistake me as not being enthusiastic about things or not wanting to talk because of some snobbish quality that doesn't really exist.
I always joke that the reason I am so shy is because my older brother talked enough for both of us when we were younger. Whether that is true or not, I cuoldn't really say, but I would highly doubt it. When I was younger I hardly spoke to anyone. I can remember in middle school making my teachers read my lips because I was that petrified of talking in class. I had one teacher that kept asking me to repeat things over and over, but I wouldn't speak loudly. I just couldn't do it. Inside I was dying of embarassment and all logical told me to just speak up so she would leave me alone, but I couldn't.
I learned to live with being shy better in high school when I met some really great friends. I began to realize that as long as I had a few close friends I didn't need to be popular and outgoing. It was during high school that I decided to get a fresh start in college and go to school out of state. I secretly hoped that in a new place I could just be a fun-loving and talkative person who didn't worry about speaking out in front of others.
It was in college that I learned I couldn't hide from who I was. No matter how hard I wanted to raise my hand and state something in class, I couldn't lift that hand out of my lap. I joined the cross-country team my freshman year and then got injured. I still went to every practice and silently waited for the runners to return. I remember once I burst into tears when the coach asked me how I was. I was just so homesick that it was bursting to come out. Luckily it was just the coach and I there at the time. Later on when I was a senior adn graduating, he mentioned about how shy I was. He said that that first year, I freaked him out a little because I was always at practice even though I was injured and I never said a word. He went on to say that he learned I was dedicated and perhaps the shyest person he had ever met. Along that same lines, I almost quit my junior year because no one was talking to me and I felt like an outsider. The coach made me tell the other runners how shy I was. Well, I didn't have to say it, he did. He just asked me to be there when he did. After that, the other runners and I got along really well. It turns out they has just thought I was a snob.
That's when I learned that sometimes it helped to admit you were shy rather than have people try to guess that about you. Sometimes that plan can backfire on you like when my cooperating teacher told me that I couldn't become a teacher because I was too shy. Luckily I was too determined to let that stop me. Most of the time though it helps people understand me better. Now, I can't just walk up to someone and tell them I am shy. I usually let someone else spread the word for me or put it in writing.
I spent my first two years out of college as a fifth grade teacher. It went well, though I didn't make too many friends. I was too shy to make the first move and too busy to have the time to worry about it. Then I ended up getting let go from that assignment. I think it had to do with the principal's poor judgement than with me since all the teachers were angered by my dismissal and he did it rather sneakily so that I couldn't fight back. Anyway, I am now interviewing once again for teaching jobs. It is tough because I get so nervous on the inside. Personally, I think I do rather well with handling it, but apparently it still seeps through. Almost every interview includes the inevitable question...'You seem shy, how does that affect your work?' I think I have finally figured out the answer to that question. I can now say, yes I am shy and it doesn't affect my work. I love working with kids and I think my quiet nature is a refresher to some kids. I have been able to connect with some of the more challenging students or with the quieter students who tend to get overlooked. I now realize I can use my shyness as an assett to why they should hire me. Now all I have to do is get the courage to say it out loud! Anyway, those are some of the highlights of my shyness and how I have learned to live with it.
I always joke that the reason I am so shy is because my older brother talked enough for both of us when we were younger. Whether that is true or not, I cuoldn't really say, but I would highly doubt it. When I was younger I hardly spoke to anyone. I can remember in middle school making my teachers read my lips because I was that petrified of talking in class. I had one teacher that kept asking me to repeat things over and over, but I wouldn't speak loudly. I just couldn't do it. Inside I was dying of embarassment and all logical told me to just speak up so she would leave me alone, but I couldn't.
I learned to live with being shy better in high school when I met some really great friends. I began to realize that as long as I had a few close friends I didn't need to be popular and outgoing. It was during high school that I decided to get a fresh start in college and go to school out of state. I secretly hoped that in a new place I could just be a fun-loving and talkative person who didn't worry about speaking out in front of others.
It was in college that I learned I couldn't hide from who I was. No matter how hard I wanted to raise my hand and state something in class, I couldn't lift that hand out of my lap. I joined the cross-country team my freshman year and then got injured. I still went to every practice and silently waited for the runners to return. I remember once I burst into tears when the coach asked me how I was. I was just so homesick that it was bursting to come out. Luckily it was just the coach and I there at the time. Later on when I was a senior adn graduating, he mentioned about how shy I was. He said that that first year, I freaked him out a little because I was always at practice even though I was injured and I never said a word. He went on to say that he learned I was dedicated and perhaps the shyest person he had ever met. Along that same lines, I almost quit my junior year because no one was talking to me and I felt like an outsider. The coach made me tell the other runners how shy I was. Well, I didn't have to say it, he did. He just asked me to be there when he did. After that, the other runners and I got along really well. It turns out they has just thought I was a snob.
That's when I learned that sometimes it helped to admit you were shy rather than have people try to guess that about you. Sometimes that plan can backfire on you like when my cooperating teacher told me that I couldn't become a teacher because I was too shy. Luckily I was too determined to let that stop me. Most of the time though it helps people understand me better. Now, I can't just walk up to someone and tell them I am shy. I usually let someone else spread the word for me or put it in writing.
I spent my first two years out of college as a fifth grade teacher. It went well, though I didn't make too many friends. I was too shy to make the first move and too busy to have the time to worry about it. Then I ended up getting let go from that assignment. I think it had to do with the principal's poor judgement than with me since all the teachers were angered by my dismissal and he did it rather sneakily so that I couldn't fight back. Anyway, I am now interviewing once again for teaching jobs. It is tough because I get so nervous on the inside. Personally, I think I do rather well with handling it, but apparently it still seeps through. Almost every interview includes the inevitable question...'You seem shy, how does that affect your work?' I think I have finally figured out the answer to that question. I can now say, yes I am shy and it doesn't affect my work. I love working with kids and I think my quiet nature is a refresher to some kids. I have been able to connect with some of the more challenging students or with the quieter students who tend to get overlooked. I now realize I can use my shyness as an assett to why they should hire me. Now all I have to do is get the courage to say it out loud! Anyway, those are some of the highlights of my shyness and how I have learned to live with it.