Post by collegeshy on Feb 5, 2010 21:21:33 GMT -5
Four weeks ago I was telling my friends how great of a roommate I had. A few days later I was saying to my roommate's mom how lucky I was to have her daughter as a roommate. And a couple of hours after that my roommate was asking me if I wanted to join her and one of her friends in a triple next year. I was elated. Finally, I felt liked! I felt wanted! I felt that life was worth living.
Then, a week later, I was sitting in my room, and my roommate was out in the hall chatting. I heard said friend's name and the word "double". My heart sank. I wasn't wanted after all. She and her friend were going to get their own room and leave me high and dry.
Of course, I couldn't be certain that this was their intention. After all, I didn't hear the whole conversation. They may have still been considering a triple. But any hope was diminished Tuesday night, when I heard my roommate and her friend discussing their preferences, clearly choosing the dorms that had the most doubles so that they would have the best chance of getting into one. I was upset, but more than anything, I was angry. I felt betrayed, mislead, and hurt. So I gave her the silent treatment. For two days.
I cracked at last when she started talking about the snow that was coming. I had to respond, but my words were tinged with bitterness. Of course, I was most angry about the housing situation, but lately she had been acting disrespectful toward me, leaving the light on late at night, bringing in friends when I was studying. This was not like her. Or was it?
Perhaps I had an idealized image of her before this incident. Because she was nice to me, listened to me, seemed to care about me. I trusted her, and forgave her errors more willingly. Now, though, I cannot trust her. And it's made my once homey dorm feel like a high school classroom.
I suppose I'm just writing to rant, to express my feelings to a neutral audience. But I am wondering, should I act like nothing happened? Try to see her in the light that I put her in before this event? Or should I be skeptical, and bear it for a few more months?
Then, a week later, I was sitting in my room, and my roommate was out in the hall chatting. I heard said friend's name and the word "double". My heart sank. I wasn't wanted after all. She and her friend were going to get their own room and leave me high and dry.
Of course, I couldn't be certain that this was their intention. After all, I didn't hear the whole conversation. They may have still been considering a triple. But any hope was diminished Tuesday night, when I heard my roommate and her friend discussing their preferences, clearly choosing the dorms that had the most doubles so that they would have the best chance of getting into one. I was upset, but more than anything, I was angry. I felt betrayed, mislead, and hurt. So I gave her the silent treatment. For two days.
I cracked at last when she started talking about the snow that was coming. I had to respond, but my words were tinged with bitterness. Of course, I was most angry about the housing situation, but lately she had been acting disrespectful toward me, leaving the light on late at night, bringing in friends when I was studying. This was not like her. Or was it?
Perhaps I had an idealized image of her before this incident. Because she was nice to me, listened to me, seemed to care about me. I trusted her, and forgave her errors more willingly. Now, though, I cannot trust her. And it's made my once homey dorm feel like a high school classroom.
I suppose I'm just writing to rant, to express my feelings to a neutral audience. But I am wondering, should I act like nothing happened? Try to see her in the light that I put her in before this event? Or should I be skeptical, and bear it for a few more months?