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Post by theoldway on Oct 27, 2012 1:49:01 GMT -5
Hello... All
I am 30 years old, male, white, heterosexual. I have had a hunch that there is something wrong with me ever since my teenage years. While my peers went on to flirt with girls and excel socially, I was left behind like a total dolt. I've always been sort of book smart so at least I could cover my front before other people, family and friends, saying that I have no time for girlfriends. There was no hiding the fact though that everyone in my circle of supposed friends was avoiding me like the plague. I have always been, in virtually every situation, the fifth wheel, the spare part, the excrement.
I have never had a long term girlfriend. Quite a few brief flings, but not a longer connection. I've been described as good looking by some women and I also keep myself fit by playing sports (which I love), so I can't help to wonder why it is that most men pair up with women quite easily, whereas I keep looking on from the sidelines.
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Post by Zoe on Oct 27, 2012 4:20:37 GMT -5
Hi there *waves* Welcome to SU! Fellow Shybies here are very friendly so I hope you will enjoy your time here. Take care
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Post by Scotty on Oct 27, 2012 8:34:41 GMT -5
Welcome to SU!
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Post by Karen on Oct 28, 2012 5:53:28 GMT -5
Hey Theoldway, welcome to SU!
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Post by theoldway on Oct 31, 2012 2:00:58 GMT -5
Thanks for the welcomes!! I haven't been able to check back here because of work and school stuff. I hope to get to know some of the people here.
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Post by jamesswfc on Dec 7, 2012 22:45:48 GMT -5
Hello and welcome!
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Post by robini123 on Dec 11, 2012 16:42:26 GMT -5
I've been described as good looking by some women and I also keep myself fit by playing sports (which I love), so I can't help to wonder why it is that most men pair up with women quite easily, whereas I keep looking on from the sidelines. It takes more than looks to attract a woman. Back in the 80's I was a tall long haired Heavy Metal guitarist. I had no problem attracting women, but I had a HUGE problem talking to them once I did. I had no confidence, and for most women this is a major turn off. People love to tell those of us that are shy that we should just be more confident... well if it were just that easy none of us would be shy! Confidence and how to conqueror it is an individual thing... what worked for me may not work for others. I am lucky, I met and fell in love with a shy woman, and we are very happy together. I am in my 40's now and not nearly as shy as I once was. My confidence developed over decades. I now realize that everyone is insecure to one degree or another... its just that some are better at hiding it than others. There are some who would say "I am not insecure" and IMO those are the most insecure people. Denial is a sign of weakness not strength. Once you realize that everybody has fear, insecurities, phobias, problems, issues... it makes it easier to overcome, or at least manage our own.
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