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Post by Outcast on Aug 20, 2008 5:50:04 GMT -5
Hello. Your story sounds very similar to what i just went through. I also met a girl who was happy to meet a new friend in me. She would be open and friendly with me as well. Until the day, she finds out/or you tell her that you have feelings for her or interested in being more than just friends. I'm not sure why, but it definitely changes things. Maybe they don't want to get our hopes up and hurt us in the end. I think Anna is right. The best thing to do now is move on. If you still want to be friends with her, you have to think in terms of being distant friends and not a very close kind of friendship. I think it's their way of turning you down gently. Make an occasional greeting or two from time to time if you want. Maybe after every month or so. If you try to make it more often than that, you might end up getting hurt in the process. So it's not really advisable. Once you have feelings for a girl. It's hard to let go. Try as you might, it will only resurface or at least still be there especially when your still close or talking to the girl often. Subconsciously these actions would only get your hopes up. It's really hard to force someone to like you back. If you want to help yourself and be confident again, i think it would be better to let her go.
Well, just think about it. Just my advice/opinion.
Good luck in whatever decision you might choose.
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Post by Outcast on Aug 19, 2008 18:56:21 GMT -5
I don't know. Some books suggests Shyness is a defense mechanism. When we just don't love ourselves enough.
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Post by Outcast on Aug 19, 2008 18:26:20 GMT -5
I've been asking myself that question quite a lot these days.
Well, here is something i read in the internet about love. It explains the difference between a love and a crush. Don't know if you guys would agree though.
It's like no other feeling you have ever experienced. You can't stop thinking about the person; your heart skips a beat every time you see them. You don't care about anything else, and would do anything in the world for that person. You click on every level: hobbies, personality, likes, dislikes. It's the most amazing feeling in the world! I don't believe there is such a thing as love at first sight. I think there is attraction at first sight but you truly have to know a person to fall in love with them. That is the difference between love and a crush. Chances are if you are infatuated with someone or have a crush on them you don't really know that person and the street is one way (you have feelings but they don't feel the same). True love is a two-way street -- the other person feels the same way about you as you feel about them.
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Post by Outcast on Jul 4, 2008 22:27:20 GMT -5
Sometimes, i wonder. Some say you should choose your friends well. While others would warn, there are people out there who only take advantage of you and use you. I have come across a lot of people and made some new aquaintances, perhaps even some friends. Yet i often find myself thinking, could i really call some of these people my friends? I guess, i have a high expectation of what friends do for each other. (Maybe seen too many movies.) I think i tend to expect more frequent two way conversations. It's just that sometimes i'm doubtful when i'm always the one calling them up or when i'm left hanging in the middle of exchanging short messages via cellphone. They greet me, I greet them back and ask how they are. But then i get no reply. Makes me kind of think i am wrong to expect anything from friends. How do you guys do it? Well here are some sites i've found regarding friends. www.tomorrowsedge.net/real-friends.htmlwww.girl.com.au/realfriends.htm
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Post by Outcast on Jun 25, 2008 3:04:39 GMT -5
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Post by Outcast on Jun 13, 2008 23:48:20 GMT -5
I've read a book on being good to yourself once. I was thinking maybe you guys have some more ideas on how to practice it. If any of you do, please share them here. Thanks.
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Post by Outcast on Jun 13, 2008 23:37:33 GMT -5
I remember that song. One of my old favorite songs too. ;D
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Post by Outcast on Jun 10, 2008 10:42:53 GMT -5
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Post by Outcast on May 25, 2008 10:58:06 GMT -5
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Post by Outcast on May 8, 2008 21:49:25 GMT -5
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Post by Outcast on May 6, 2008 19:35:17 GMT -5
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Post by Outcast on Apr 25, 2008 20:57:56 GMT -5
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Post by Outcast on Apr 21, 2008 2:00:10 GMT -5
What do they teach you in Shyness groups seminars/sessions/therapies? I've always been curious if their advices could work.
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Post by Outcast on Apr 21, 2008 1:44:50 GMT -5
My Mom used to say that when i was a kid i was quite different. I was a very active and talkative kid. I don't remember much what happened to change all that. I do remember one of my classmates pulling away the chair behind me when we were doing a school presentation. I can't remember what happened next. In elementary school till high school, i know i didn't like to participate in class or in worse , speak in front of the class. But i had still had a small group of friends back then. It was only later in High School when i lost contact with my best friend that i think i didn't want to get too close to anyone again. Although in college, i had a classmate. He was a scholar and his personality was more outgoing. I didn't tried to get too close, but he was the only one who i can hang out with. Yeah, eventually he got so popular with the other students, it just seemed out of place for me to hang out with him that often....
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Post by Outcast on Dec 9, 2007 11:53:10 GMT -5
Well, for me at least, there will always be a God. And I believe that God will always be here watching over us all.
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