Post by InmanRoshi on Jan 20, 2004 18:36:54 GMT -5
I tend to get bored with "Self Help" books, as I consider them to be a lot of convoluted, feel-good, mumbo-jumbo. I'm a proud skeptic, so many of the authors of "psycho-babble" have very little credibility with me. Most of the authors credentials are sketchy, at best (ie "Ph.D" in "relationship studies" from Fuzzy Wuzzy Womb Feelings University). And there is a lot of debate within the scientific community as to how much the "legitimate" psychoanalysis is even based in cold scientific fact.
So I was recommended the book "Mean Genes", by Terry Burnham and Jay Phelan. One has his Ph.D in Economics from Harvard and an MBA in computer science from MIT, and another has his PhD in biology from Harvard.
Basically, the book is an attempt to explain the unexplainable in human behavour by relating it to inherent survival mechanisms stemming from the evolution of our species. From drugs, gambling, risk, greed, debt, sex .. it covers the gambet.
But one thing that really struck a nerve was why women so often categorize all shy men in the "I don't like him in that way" category, and strictly view us as "just friends". Think about the cavemen. There were two types of cavemen ... those who cowered in their caves died there, and those who left their caves, took risks and won." Risk taking triggers a biochemical reward system in which our brain produces dopamine, the feel good chemical. Women who prefer to stay with a man who mistreats them may believe that by choosing "danger" they are actually securing superior genes for her unborn children — the genes of "winners." Sure, he may not be as nice to her as the stay-at-home cave dweller, but there’s something about being with that bad boy that just makes her feel great (i.e., the dopamine). After all, if confidence is strength, the guy who confidently serves his own self-interest (rather than being more thoughtful to her) may seem stronger. On the other hand, the guy who goes out of his way to bend to her every whim may be nice to hang around with, but fails to evidence the kind of "chemistry" a woman’s genes may associate with good survival. The doctors even point to a chemical in the blood, the less monoamine oxidase an individual has in his or her system, the more likely that person is to crave excitement and take risks.
Anyway, its hardly a groundbreaking topic on this board, but I recommend the book. Its insightfull on a variety of topics.
So I was recommended the book "Mean Genes", by Terry Burnham and Jay Phelan. One has his Ph.D in Economics from Harvard and an MBA in computer science from MIT, and another has his PhD in biology from Harvard.
Basically, the book is an attempt to explain the unexplainable in human behavour by relating it to inherent survival mechanisms stemming from the evolution of our species. From drugs, gambling, risk, greed, debt, sex .. it covers the gambet.
But one thing that really struck a nerve was why women so often categorize all shy men in the "I don't like him in that way" category, and strictly view us as "just friends". Think about the cavemen. There were two types of cavemen ... those who cowered in their caves died there, and those who left their caves, took risks and won." Risk taking triggers a biochemical reward system in which our brain produces dopamine, the feel good chemical. Women who prefer to stay with a man who mistreats them may believe that by choosing "danger" they are actually securing superior genes for her unborn children — the genes of "winners." Sure, he may not be as nice to her as the stay-at-home cave dweller, but there’s something about being with that bad boy that just makes her feel great (i.e., the dopamine). After all, if confidence is strength, the guy who confidently serves his own self-interest (rather than being more thoughtful to her) may seem stronger. On the other hand, the guy who goes out of his way to bend to her every whim may be nice to hang around with, but fails to evidence the kind of "chemistry" a woman’s genes may associate with good survival. The doctors even point to a chemical in the blood, the less monoamine oxidase an individual has in his or her system, the more likely that person is to crave excitement and take risks.
Anyway, its hardly a groundbreaking topic on this board, but I recommend the book. Its insightfull on a variety of topics.