How to approach a shy man?

[Yun]

I hope this is the right place for this post. Please forgive me if not.

Sweet Pea has already adressed this a bit in the thread "She likes me... or not"...



A short summary of my situation:

I met someone online, with whom I chat every so often and have called once. He says of himself that he is very shy, but he must feel comfortable with me, for I don't sense any shyness

I've realized on the other hand that he doesn't have much experience in "interacting" with women.

We've both said that we like eachother, but now I'm lost as to what to do.

I would like to meet him to see if we get along offline as well and maybe pursue a relationship, but I don't want him to feel intimidated, cornered or pushed into it and I don't want to come across as aggressive.

So my question to mainly the shy men on this board is how to tell him without scaring him off?
Any tips or advice

Thanks in advance

[CaryGrant]

I suggest treating him much like you would treat any man you met this way: ask if he would like to meet for coffee/tea at XXX coffeeshop. If he runs away, it's not your fault - his fears may have simply been too great for him to overcome at this stage. It might help if there was something concrete to do while there, like discuss a book/movie/whatever you've been talking about online.

[Yun]

Thanks for your input

I forgot to mention that we live in different states, with a two hour flight between us, (which I'm willing to take upon me ;D)

That is what I'm afraid might scare him off...

[Schmoo]

Have you guys spoken on the phone yet? I would think that would be the next step before actually meeting. Or sending each other photos? Communicating via email is so "safe" and impersonal.

[Yun]

Yes, we have spoken on the phone. He gave me his number and I called him. We spoke for some time and there was no shyness on his part, if you ask me.
I know what he looks like, but the opposite cannot be said. I was going just let him see me in person, since I always look different in pictures...my own mother never recognizes me in them

...but if it helps, I'll see if I can find a more current one and send it, so that he has an idea of what I look like