Explaining SA to ppl who dont have it...

[Julie]

Explaining SA to ppl who dont have it...

I find this very hard and infact on a few occassions on a chat network someone has asked me "what is SA?" there is a channel on the network for this and as admin this is quite frequently asked... I normally answer and just explain.. but sometimes a user may give a strange look as if to say .. its something wierd.. at that point I often dont know what to say.. and normally refer them to look under Social anxiety on google..

Then I feel mad at myself .. am I ashamed.. or did he/she make me feel judged.. Why is it so hard to admit... everyone on the network know I have sa and im always in the channels.. So why do i clamp up when im in another general channel and not mental health related and someone asks..

Anyone else feel this way?

[Jarous]

No, this never happened to me online, but I can easily relate offline. I always feel like they'd hear me and then react like 'What??? you can't TALK to people? Man, you can't be serious. You call these problems? Now, I'll tell you what real problems look like...' But in fact all that is purely hypothetical because no one ever asked me (none of my frinds even know about SAD) and I am still gathering courage to tell my closest friends. Perhaps only a real dumbass would react in such a way and I don't intend on telling dumbasses :-).

If I was a betting type, I'd say you clam up because you don't expect the people in general channel to know about your problem and think they wouldn't listen long enough for you to explain in full. Just an idea though.

[Ghost]

Don't feel ashamed or mad Julie, no one is perfect or can be the ultimate FAQ

Perhaps a good idea is to read in about as much as possible about SA. Like professional opinions of doctors and such. That should put weight to your words and should make at least some people understand that if doctors have stamped it a condition, it must be serious and not a way to get attention or something.

I think that SA may especially have a higher chance at a certain type of people. Coupled with circumstances they lived/live in, can cause SA and isolation. Just a idea. But I would stand by reading about the subject so that you feel confident and know how to explain it in a way that it makes sense, perhaps.

Just a suggestion

[Julie]

Thanks for your comments

I have done a lot of research on SA and have resently opened a chat site myself for Anxiety Support... Yet i think its not so much how to tell ppl what it is.. but more their reactions to it..
That is where i find it hard.. This can be both online and in real life.. however real life is harder as its face to face and i then would have nothing to refer them too such as a site or search engine.. In a way using these relief the stress at that point and gets ppl off my back or stops the feeling of being put on the spot..

About a yr ago i moved and signed up with a new Doctor.. Id been diagnosed with SA about 4 yrs ago but have had it all my life.. When i new i had it.. it was me who brought it up and asked the doctor about SA.. I asked about it and said that id met some ppl online and they referred me to a site.. Something about how i could relate to a lot of their problems or beliefs.. and that I wanted to know if i had SA.. At that point my then Doctor told me he knew i had SA and Slight agrophobia.. Hmm puzzled i thought then it would had been nice for him to had let me know all this time...

Then about a yr ago i moved north and needed change of doctors.. after going to an accessment medical.. he was talking about past history and asking about illnesses.. I said i am SA... He said you're what..? I said i have SA, Social anxiety.. he said OOH that.. and then on referred to me as having anxiety only.. This made me feel like he wasnt 100% with the disorder.. Sinse then he has made comments about me getting out more and facing things.. bla bla.. I've faced things and tried this all my life.. what does he think my life is.. Now I dont talk to my doctor regarding this .. I dont feel he understands or believes in SA related issues.. I wouldnt change the doctor for many reasons.. apart from this sa thing he is generally good.. If i change mine, I also have 3 children to change.. do I really want more appointments. I tend to avoid if i can and whats to say another doctor will understand.. However i am moving back South in a week or so (Wiltshire) and will need a new doctor then... im hoping this will solve that and the new doctor will understand it..

Now, I wonder, if a medical doctor cant understand HOW will anyone else.. and what if they are so negative?