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Post by MissAnxiety on Nov 13, 2003 14:33:42 GMT -5
I've also been "talking" in the Social Anxiety Support website (because, of course, I have SA ), but I tend to get bad vibes there . What's up with that? A few of the boards I posted got negative replies (and I understand people are not always going to agree with you but you don't have to put it so rudely!). I sometimes don't think all those people have SA, but I don't want to accuse anyone . There is such a thing as not wanting to be around people though, because they don't like people, not because they make them feel uncomfortable, feel judged, etc. They can be arrogant, thinking they are better than everyone, too. (I don't want to sound bad here...just expressing what I feel.) These people (the ones who may not have SA) may be mad at the world. I dunno, I'm just bothered that the last postings I put had a negative response...I was basically called insane. I hadn't already had a good day so that didn't make it go any better. Anyway, I mentioned that I must be in the wrong board, that I should go find the insane one ;D. *sighs*
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Post by MissAnxiety on Nov 13, 2003 14:34:30 GMT -5
...sorry if it doesn't make sense. It's one of those days.
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Rio
New Member
Posts: 5
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Post by Rio on Nov 15, 2003 15:23:07 GMT -5
The thing with message boards and forums is that people can get away with alot more, than they would in reality, i mean expressing themselves openly, because there is no theat of being put down, or being made to feel stupid . Thats the reason their doing it, because they probably have it done to them in the real world, How pathetic is trying to mock someone on an internet message board? its weak and you should tell them that. You can express your opinion as much as you like, whether people agree or not, because its [glow=red,2,300]yours[/glow], and [glow=blue,2,300]you[/glow] are entitled to it. Remember this whether you are online or offline, i know what its like to be made to feel like your insignificant in a large group of people, although it might not feel like it, you are just as good as them and have just as much right to be there as they do (am i making myself clear or do i am i just rambling?). I think its ridiculous you were called INSANE, and you definatly shouldnt let it get to you, anyway, whats Insane?/Freak/ weird/ strange, its just what someone else doesnt understand. Maybe you have "Creative Interpretation" (another suggestion to post back to them?) you sound sad, upset. I hope this cheers you up, because i re-registered on this website (i forgot my other username and password) because i wanted to reply to this post. Dont ever feel you are worthless, its all pshcoyogical anyway, if you dont feel confident then you wont be, look at your strenghts, i hope you reply to this, and tell me how it goes. xx
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Post by Mythangel on Nov 15, 2003 18:31:55 GMT -5
Hey Miss Anxiety,some people can be rude without realizing it. Being anonymous can give you certian freedoms that you otherwise would not have, But it`s still not right.I really don`t think they mean any harm. The controversy page is tough, not everyone can handle it. They debate a lot of subjects in there,and if you want to join in on a debate you really have to be able to take it.Sarcasm is allowed in there,but that`s as far as they can go.They are really decent people outside that section.As for as me they`ve never got to me before,but i had a med change and it really screwed me up.The meds made me hypersensitive,and i never should have been in there.SAS is a good board maybe you can give it another chance.
I like this board alot,it not so busy,it`s more relaxed
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Post by spitzig on Nov 15, 2003 21:51:18 GMT -5
The thing with message boards and forums is that people can get away with alot more, than they would in reality, i mean expressing themselves openly, because there is no theat of being put down, or being made to feel stupid . Thats the reason their doing it, because they probably have it done to them in the real world, How pathetic is trying to mock someone on an internet message board? its weak and you should tell them that. It's pretty weak in real life, too. Most forums and newsgroups have lots of flames, which are largely insults with little content behind the insults. Oh, a schizophrenic friend who runs a mental illness group is fond of the saying "normal is just the most common form of fu cked up".
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Post by shyvegan on Nov 16, 2003 0:29:50 GMT -5
Some people have been making very rude comments to me on here too. I have no idea why. I thought about leaving, but maybe I should hang in just a little longer. I just want to say that, I sure don't want to hurt anyone by posting. But I don't really know why I have been put down so much. I just became a member to see if I could start to feel more comfortable talking to people by writing. I don't talk much in public. It's very hard to do this too. I am good at running away from my problems and not dealing with them. So I don't know how much more I can take, before I leave. Also if people are going to say such bad things to me, why don't they have a member status instead of guest? Does anyone else have this problem posting?
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Post by glenn miller on Nov 16, 2003 10:15:46 GMT -5
i am the same way. people have not said that much bad to me on these things. but i undestand u guys. this is the only way i can say what i want. since i am real shy person. so i understand u guys.
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Post by shyschitso on Nov 17, 2003 0:55:26 GMT -5
Two of my alternate personalities, shycanofwhoopass and moeszyslak posted in this forum and hurt a certain lady. On behalf of both of them (i.e. me) I apologize. Please don't leave us. Oh, and I really love animals, dogs especially, they are so cute! I hope you understand me, these two guys always gobble up meat, and then I end up vomiting it back out.
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Post by shyschitzo on Nov 17, 2003 0:57:27 GMT -5
Forgot to mention, another one of my much more benign personalities has a member status here. I won't uncover which one, it's a secret.
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MissAnxiety as Guest
Guest
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Post by MissAnxiety as Guest on Nov 26, 2003 11:59:48 GMT -5
MythAngel, actually I never mentioned anything about the controversy board. I cannot even get in that board there. You have to have permission, so I've never posted anything out there. If I did have access, I wouldn't post anything there anyway because I'm not very good at debates. I don't do good when I'm put on the spot. It makes me nervous and worried so I can't usually think. This was a general topic. (I'm not going to mention what it was about so I don't stur anything up here.) Yes, people have their opinions, but they can write or say it in a better way. It wasn't like I wrote anything rude or was rude to them, etc. I actually had almost everyone that posted a reply on the discussion against me...and yes, I understand it's going to happen...but to feel like you were cornered over a stupid topic doesn't make me feel real great...actually, I don't know who would feel great after that. I can't help how I feel. I have left SAS because of this. I worried about the discussion for many days. Yes, it sounds ridiculous but I can't help it. I tried not to worry and get bothered, but I did. That is part of SA--is to worry. Not to put you on the spot or anything but, MythAngel, weren't you feeling the same way on SAS? You are the same "MythAngel" here as on SAS, right? Or is that coincidence? Anyway, if that is you, I thought you posted something on SAS, feeling that people were replying negatively to you? Well anyways, I have been away from this site as well lately, too. It's hard. I'm afraid to come around...worry and afraid to see what people might say. Rio, thanks. I totally agree with your posting. Like I said above, I've stayed away from SAS...so nothing has happened. I've been keeping low, worrying about things offline . Yes, you cheered me up seeing that you re-registered to reply to my posting ;D. Thanks so much. shyvegan, I know how you feel. I always want to run away from problems and situations too...and I can't always which makes me (what's a good word) "scared" I guess you can say. You the same way? I try to not let people see me physically "scared" or "worried," which I do a good job at (they know I'm shy, though). Hey shyvegan, would you like to email me? Just let me know and we can "talk" . shyschitso, good to see that you're apologizing for whatever you did . I hope "she" forgives you .
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Post by CaryGrant on Nov 26, 2003 17:36:00 GMT -5
Hi Miss A,
Please don't stay away. It doesn't feel good if you feel attacked, I agree. Shy people also tend to take attacks on their viewpoint personally, which doesn't help one feel good about oneself, wot? However, with practice, we can choose our reaction.
I went to something locally called Cafe Philosophy, in which people debate/discuss a particular philosophical view, in this case something to do with kindness. (I do ok with this sort of thing if I can keep my anxiety level down.)
Anyway, when I first voiced my opinion, few people agreed with me, and several people spoke against me. My reaction? To get mildly angry - a defensive measure to protect my ego and still allow me to think and defend myself. (It helped that I knew they were all wrong. ;D) The point is, my reaction was useful to me. In the past, I might have been embarassed, fearful that now people didn't like me, and shut down. Somewhere along the way, I chose a more useful response to this kind of threat.
Did that make any sense?
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Post by Mythangel on Nov 27, 2003 5:56:37 GMT -5
Hey Miss Anxiety Yes i`m the same one,and i almost left the board over a post. I have been running away from people and situations all my life,and i`m tired of running.I can`t let a few people get me down, and make me want to run anymore. It`s time i make a stand. Miss Anxiety you have to do what you feel is right for you,and i respect that. For me, i have to stay.........a little while aleast.
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Post by MissAnxiety on Dec 2, 2003 10:47:28 GMT -5
Mythangel, sorry to hear about that. Glad you stuck with it and stayed. I might go back there, who knows. For now, I think I will stay away. Yeah, I hate running too...but it's like that's all I want to do to get away from situations and problems. Unfortunately, I let even one person get me down. I really hate living like that. Yes, it did, CaryGrant . For some reason, in debates, I cannot defend myself. I can't ever think clearly or speak clearly. I can think of things later down the road, but when I'm put on the spotlight, I guess I panic or something, can't really explain. I'm not quick I guess. I can say that because maybe I'm shy and have SA, but to tell you the truth, I think I'm just not a verbal person. I more like things put in front of me, like a visual thing. Did I make sense ? Did this Cafe Philosophy help you with your reaction and debates, or was this something you learned on your own?
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Post by CaryGrant on Dec 2, 2003 12:03:06 GMT -5
Hi Miss M,
The Cafe Philosophy is in some ways a good way for shy people to speak up - it depends upon what you are shy about. There are about 30 people scattered at tables and sofas around the room, and anyone who wants to can speak his/her piece. After any one person talks, many other people will talk before you can stick your hand up and be acknowledged again, so shy people have lots of time to think and analyse.
I think many SA people are like you - when anxious, we get "stupid." I find that when I can stay relaxed, I am suddenly less "stupid," am more socially aware, and am able to participate in conversations - even be witty! Ha ha! If you are "quick" after the situation and pressure have passed, then you can be quick in it - once you have overcome the anxiety.
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Post by MissAnxiety on Dec 2, 2003 14:23:02 GMT -5
The Cafe Philosophy sounds like a good thing. ;D
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