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Post by shyvegan on Nov 9, 2003 17:16:05 GMT -5
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Post by shycanofwhoopass on Nov 10, 2003 0:00:42 GMT -5
Hi, my name is shycanofwhoopass because I have a hard time talking to people especially in person and because I am about to open on you if you don't stop flooding these forums and goofing around when people try to discuss serious topics.
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Post by spitzig on Nov 11, 2003 1:56:56 GMT -5
I think goofing around is good. ;D
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Post by shyvegan on Nov 11, 2003 10:55:01 GMT -5
I guess if anyone emailed me I wouldn't know what to say anyway. But I wasn't joking, I really would like to talk to someone. But then no one probably wants to hear me complain about my life. Oh I never smile. I find it hard to do. That I am sure keeps most people from wanting to talk to me in person.
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siri
New Member
Posts: 19
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Post by siri on Nov 17, 2003 5:41:35 GMT -5
me too. i find it hard what to say even thru email. and i most people comment on my lack of smiling. maybe thats why they that im hard to approach
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Post by shyvegan on Nov 17, 2003 19:55:27 GMT -5
I am thinking of making a shirt that says: "I am smiling"
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siri
New Member
Posts: 19
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Post by siri on Nov 18, 2003 0:00:09 GMT -5
can you make one for me too.... it wouldn't be hasseld of telling people that your not frowning everytime they meet you... ;D ;D
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2shy
New Member
Posts: 5
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Post by 2shy on Nov 18, 2003 10:20:11 GMT -5
I am thinking of making a shirt that says: "I am smiling" There is a story told about one of our (that's South African) previous prime ministers and smiling. He was a bit of a surly chap as well as short tempered and the story goes that a photographer once asked him to just please smile for the photo and the PM snarled " I am smiling". The book in which I read this, also published the photo allegedly taken on the occasion: all I can say is that the writing on his shirt would have had to be very, very large... ;D But jokes aside, I know what you mean. I do smile, but it takes me few seconds to recognise that the situation calls for smiling, that I'm happy to smile in this situation and then to get the muscles to move. By that time, I've passed the person I was supposed to greet with a smile. Maybe my shirt should say "Wait a sec, I'm working on the smile."
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Post by Boblouie58 on Nov 19, 2003 1:51:26 GMT -5
Well, guys, I joined tonight. I'm not really sure how I found this site but if there was ever anyone shy its me! I'm typing away thinking about what "all of us" have had to deal with in our lives, on shyness. I was painfully shy and would break out in a cold/warm sweat and turn red as a beet, if I ever spoke in public, so I just kept my mouth shut. BUT, I'll email chat with anyone on any subject. This forum is great as neither of us know each other. Any of you say that you would accept an email from me, then I'll send you one from down here in Oklahoma..where the "corn is as high as an elephant's eye"...provided we had rain. LOL
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2shy
New Member
Posts: 5
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Post by 2shy on Nov 19, 2003 11:18:39 GMT -5
BUT, I'll email chat with anyone on any subject. Any of you say that you would accept an email from me, then I'll send you one from down here in Oklahoma..where the "corn is as high as an elephant's eye"...provided we had rain. LOL Hi. Drop me a line. (I write about anything but musicals. lol)
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Post by Boblouie58 on Nov 22, 2003 0:29:19 GMT -5
No one now believes that I was as shy as they come or at least I felt so. I have overcome most of my shyness problems by meeting them head on and surrounding myself with people I feel comfortable. Many of you are dealing with your situations in therapy and I only once long ago went and talked to a friend to ask him, if thinking about doing oneself in was normal or not. He asked me to read a book called, "I'm okay, your okay". Well, this book talked about many of our shy problems, our social problems and our life's problems. When I went back to discuss what I felt I understood on this book my comment was, "I feel that I am okay and the guy who wrote this book in not"! This was my opinion and I wasn't really told whether my assesment was correct or not. But I did feel after reading this book and thinking of my life up to that point....being very shy that I certainly wasn't much different in my shy thoughts than anyone else. People in general are too much interested in their own problems to worry about our problems. People may look at us but they are really looking thru us and not noticing us. Even if you were wearing bright colors with polka dots, they might glance your way and yes see you but that is their only thought. As I mentioned, I am here to "chat via email" with any of you. I will chat as we are anonymous and can get up the courage to talk. You have a much better chance talking to another shy person who knows what it is to be shy, so we can each relate. Let me know, if you are agreeable to email and I'll email you.
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Post by spitzig on Nov 22, 2003 3:57:01 GMT -5
When I went back to discuss what I felt I understood on this book my comment was, "I feel that I am okay and the guy who wrote this book in not"! This was my opinion and I wasn't really told whether my assesment was correct or not. A lot of people get into psychology to fix their own problems.
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Post by bren on Nov 23, 2003 11:30:16 GMT -5
I read all the postings on this site, and I am happy (?) to see that I am not the only one! I have been very shy since I was a young teen, and I'm a man approaching middle age now. Shyness hasn't just affected my life, it has been my life, and I have tried various ways to combat it.
I think 'normal' people are split roughly into two groups in their attitudes to shy people - they either think its a 'sweet' personality trait, or they are downright malicious about it, and see your enforced silence and feelings of awkwardness as opportunities for mockery. The number of times I have had people (particularly women (no offence meant)) adopt the "Awwwwwwwwww, look he's blushing." tone, when the truth is I am tortured with embarrasment. I often wonder if they would verbalise the same way if they were at the scene of a serious road accident - "Awwwwwwww look, the poor man's been thrown through the windscreen." The other side of the coin are the sneers, laughter and malice that people throw in your face if they sense that you feel awkward. People hate or fear what they can't understand, and their response is frequently to attempt to destroy whatever the object of their ignorance is. I know that I am stating the obvious, at least to other people wh o have first hand experience of deeply ingrained shyness, so I hope no one feels patronized by my comments.
I read on one of the posts that people with our 'problem' do tend to turn 'psychologist', and I'm definately guilty of that. Whenever I have sought professional help, i have always been told that I have a good insught into my problem, though it hasn't got me far (not yet anyway). The professionals have duly prescribed me anti depressants, in spite of the fact that I have argued that I am depressed BECAUSE I am shy, not because I otherwise have an inclination to be depressed. I think that long term shyness, and the lack of social contact that comes with it would make anyone depressed eventually!! I explained to the professionals that the medication may relieve my low feelings, but i will still be shy, and so i will just become depressed again when the pain of social exclusion has set back in! I still have;nt got through to any one though. has anyone here had similar experiences? SHYVEGAN.... send me one of those t-shirts. thanks robotone_5@hotmail.com
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Post by CaryGrant on Nov 23, 2003 12:28:05 GMT -5
Shyvegan, I meant to say...anyone who can come up with an idea like that for a T-shirt...must have a pretty decent sense of humour. Let it out!
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Post by smartie on Nov 23, 2003 14:35:20 GMT -5
I'm new here, and I'd like to make friends with others who know what it's like to be shy. Any contact on any subject fro anyone would be great ;D
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