Post by mk2jettavr6 on Apr 22, 2007 21:10:57 GMT -5
This is my 1st Post on SU and i felt this was the best place to post it for anyone intrested to get to know me a little better. (hopefully i get some replys)
I have been through alot in the 25 years i have been alive and from what i can gather, the root of my problems is shyness. I dont have the time to tell everything but ill go over the basics as to what brought me to where i am today and hopefully someone can offer me a little good advice as where to go next with my life. I am basically lost and have no idea where to turn so any advice any of you have would greatly help.
I have been shy as long as i can remember , I have had a hard time making friends and the thing bothers me the most, ive NEVER had a girlfriend. I AM a great guy and have 100%confidence in myself that any girl would see that if they got to know me buti am afraid to approack them due to total lack of self confidenceand fear of making a bad first impression. back in middle school and highschool 2 girls have approached me one outright saying she liked me and the other hinting at it but not telling me outright. I mean this shows some girls are comming to me without me doing any work and i am still afraid to talk to them? somethingis really rong here, this bothers me tremondeously, i think about it almost everyday.
IN school and into college i was the good quiet kid, never EVER got into trouble or used drugs of anykind, never even smoked a cig.... till partially through college i started experminting with drugs to try to help me losten up and feel better about myself since seeing a doctor and being on zoloft and paxil never worked. i was desprate and made some bad choice and experimented with some BAD drugs, to sum it up i became a HERION ADDICT in about 6 months time from never even trying weed to becomming a full blown junkie which ended me up serving some jail time and also a rehab program. when i left the rehab i slipped up for a couple weeks for the same reasons , i lewft rehab all confident and happy with myself and was so shure i would be able to talk to girls and conquered my shyness but didnt, within 8 weeks i was shooting dope again 6 weeks later i OVERDOSED and was unconsicence for 10 min and almost died if my friend didnt call the police, i used alot that night cuz i felt the pain, sadness and lonliness and sadness of not even having a friend of the opposite sex and it just made me soo upset i used toomuch.
well something positive came out of that experience , i have sobered up and have looked at life with a muchmore positive attitude, i have met one good friends and have tried talking to girls more andmore and tried dating sites and myspace and stuff to meet girls noluckyet but i have hope....
but, it still really hurts me wheni see girls and guys together, for example today i went to a carshow with my best friend and isaw alot of guys walking arround with there girls and it just hurts soo bad and makes me soo sad. Ill admit im extremly jelous, but on the same token i think i deserve to be happy just as much as thoes guys doo, the whole 3 hr drive home from the show all i was doing was crying infront of my best friend and discussing how i feel about this , he understands but prolly thinks im nuts cuz its all i dell on, but i cant blame myself, i feel i deserve to be happy too.
incidents like this trigger the feelings of going back to drugs cuz i feel as if i will never reach my goals and oversome shyness and talk to girls, now its easer for me to talk to guys and make friends but i stillhave trouble with girls im working again now and saving money got a car and am doing well and i dont wanna loose this all again to drugs, what if i OD again but dont wake up this time? or end up back in jail? this scares the CRAP OUT OF ME!
if anyone has any good advice please share! im all ears and need all the help i can get!!!! I apoligize for the poor spelling and structure of this post but all i wanted to do is get my point across as quickly as possibile.
thanks again! im glad you took the time to read my post!!!
I have been through alot in the 25 years i have been alive and from what i can gather, the root of my problems is shyness. I dont have the time to tell everything but ill go over the basics as to what brought me to where i am today and hopefully someone can offer me a little good advice as where to go next with my life. I am basically lost and have no idea where to turn so any advice any of you have would greatly help.
I have been shy as long as i can remember , I have had a hard time making friends and the thing bothers me the most, ive NEVER had a girlfriend. I AM a great guy and have 100%confidence in myself that any girl would see that if they got to know me buti am afraid to approack them due to total lack of self confidenceand fear of making a bad first impression. back in middle school and highschool 2 girls have approached me one outright saying she liked me and the other hinting at it but not telling me outright. I mean this shows some girls are comming to me without me doing any work and i am still afraid to talk to them? somethingis really rong here, this bothers me tremondeously, i think about it almost everyday.
IN school and into college i was the good quiet kid, never EVER got into trouble or used drugs of anykind, never even smoked a cig.... till partially through college i started experminting with drugs to try to help me losten up and feel better about myself since seeing a doctor and being on zoloft and paxil never worked. i was desprate and made some bad choice and experimented with some BAD drugs, to sum it up i became a HERION ADDICT in about 6 months time from never even trying weed to becomming a full blown junkie which ended me up serving some jail time and also a rehab program. when i left the rehab i slipped up for a couple weeks for the same reasons , i lewft rehab all confident and happy with myself and was so shure i would be able to talk to girls and conquered my shyness but didnt, within 8 weeks i was shooting dope again 6 weeks later i OVERDOSED and was unconsicence for 10 min and almost died if my friend didnt call the police, i used alot that night cuz i felt the pain, sadness and lonliness and sadness of not even having a friend of the opposite sex and it just made me soo upset i used toomuch.
well something positive came out of that experience , i have sobered up and have looked at life with a muchmore positive attitude, i have met one good friends and have tried talking to girls more andmore and tried dating sites and myspace and stuff to meet girls noluckyet but i have hope....
but, it still really hurts me wheni see girls and guys together, for example today i went to a carshow with my best friend and isaw alot of guys walking arround with there girls and it just hurts soo bad and makes me soo sad. Ill admit im extremly jelous, but on the same token i think i deserve to be happy just as much as thoes guys doo, the whole 3 hr drive home from the show all i was doing was crying infront of my best friend and discussing how i feel about this , he understands but prolly thinks im nuts cuz its all i dell on, but i cant blame myself, i feel i deserve to be happy too.
incidents like this trigger the feelings of going back to drugs cuz i feel as if i will never reach my goals and oversome shyness and talk to girls, now its easer for me to talk to guys and make friends but i stillhave trouble with girls im working again now and saving money got a car and am doing well and i dont wanna loose this all again to drugs, what if i OD again but dont wake up this time? or end up back in jail? this scares the CRAP OUT OF ME!
if anyone has any good advice please share! im all ears and need all the help i can get!!!! I apoligize for the poor spelling and structure of this post but all i wanted to do is get my point across as quickly as possibile.
thanks again! im glad you took the time to read my post!!!
