new to the board..(from belgium)..jobs..

[sweetness]

Hello everyone, i found this website looking for information on shyness on the web. I was looking for people to talk to about shyness and was hoping to get in contact with other shy people. Are there people from Belgium here too? or is this a website from the us?
I am myself 26 yrs old, and from college for 2 yrs this summer. I was wondering what kind of jobs that you do? Is it difficult or are you able to be not so shy in your job? How do you cope with your boss for me it s hard to speak out at work to my boss,we have to work together the whole day. I feel like i dont get much respect, but i hate the idea that it s partly of my shyness that I allow them to treat me disrespectfull.

[Twice-Shy]

Hello Sweetness. Welcome to SHY United Forums. You've definitely come to the right place. The people on these boards will give you a warm welcome. Our members are from right across the world from the US, to the UK to Ireland (myself). Shyness is global.

Everybody who checks out these Forums have a lot in common. The problems you are having at work are pretty typical. We've talked about it here many times. It might be interresting to check through some of the older threads.

I had similar problems in my last job. Like you, I felt like I was being isolated and I had problems with my boss. She had no respect for me at all. The fact that I was a lowely temp and the lowest grade possible didn't help matters.

The behaviour of you co-workers and your boss is their problem not yours. It's bad management. Good management would never let the situation you find yourself in arise. What it boils down to in extreme cases is no morre than bullying.

Changing job may be an option but that's often is far easier said than done. If you stay at your current job you'll have to show a lot of tenacity. If things deteriote you might think about making a formal complaint. If they behaved the same way to a disabled person they woul dbe hauled over the hot coals.

Keep coming back to this Forum. It really is a great way to share problems and experiences. It also helps build confidence.

For the past few months, informal chats have been run every Fri, Sat and Sunday from 8pm UK time. I'm just about to make a post on this board that people are free to chat anytime any day. Come along and have a chat.

Our chatroom is on the main SHY United site. Just look for the 'SHY Chat' link on any page.

[Mildman1]

Welcome Sweetness!
I'm from London, in my 30's and have had a number of jobs.
I've probably been fortunate in that my managers have never treated me any differently to other employees although I am quieter than most. I know though that sometimes my colleagues have said some nasty things about me behind my back,and this has obviously made me less comfortable in my working environment. Probably through practice I've learned to be less sensitive, and to largely ignore anything negative said about me on a personal basis, and just to concentrate on my work.
I do try to treat my colleagues with respect, although I sometimes inadvertently upset them, and I don't step on other people in order to make myself look better. At least this way, even if colleagues don't want to be my mate, I can say to myself that I'm trying to be a decent person, and I hope that they can see that.

[glenn]

i have a hard time with it to. but it is hard for me jus tto get a job.

[NewOrleansLady]

Hi, sweetness. Welcome to SHY United. I'm in the US and work for a catering company, I'm working on going to culinery school in the fall. Working in restaurants, you can't really afford to be shy so it's helped me come out of my shell a little bit. I consider myself "quiet" now, rather than shy. I do sometimes feel as if people are walking all over me because, I never complain. I don't think that it is very professional to complain at work and probably wouldn't even if I weren't shy but, nobody ever recognizes a person with principals.
Anyway, I'm 27 years old, married and have a one year old son. Having my son has helped me out A LOT with my shyness. Now that I have a person relying on me, I guess that it's made me feel like I have to forget about my reservations and take control of things.

[spitzig]

I'm a programmer, but I lost my job. My shyness didn't exactly help me find another one.

So, I'm in grad school full-time for comp sci. I'm living on loans, dreading paying them back. Hoping the market improves by the time I graduate, too.

[sweetnessreply]

shane said:

Hello Sweetness. Welcome to SHY United Forums. You've definitely come to the right place. The people on these boards will give you a warm welcome. Our members are from right across the world from the US, to the UK to Ireland (myself). Shyness is global.

Everybody who checks out these Forums have a lot in common. The problems you are having at work are pretty typical. We've talked about it here many times. It might be interresting to check through some of the older threads.

I had similar problems in my last job. Like you, I felt like I was being isolated and I had problems with my boss. She had no respect for me at all. The fact that I was a lowely temp and the lowest grade possible didn't help matters.

The behaviour of you co-workers and your boss is their problem not yours. It's bad management. Good management would never let the situation you find yourself in arise. What it boils down to in extreme cases is no morre than bullying.

Changing job may be an option but that's often is far easier said than done. If you stay at your current job you'll have to show a lot of tenacity. If things deteriote you might think about making a formal complaint. If they behaved the same way to a disabled person they woul dbe hauled over the hot coals.

Keep coming back to this Forum. It really is a great way to share problems and experiences. It also helps build confidence.

For the past few months, informal chats have been run every Fri, Sat and Sunday from 8pm UK time. I'm just about to make a post on this board that people are free to chat anytime any day. Come along and have a chat.

Our chatroom is on the main SHY United site. Just look for the 'SHY Chat' link on any page.



Thank you for the warm wellcome, and for the advice.
I ve been saying for months that i want to change jobs, but in fact i m also scared of a new job, coz i dont know what to expect either. Still I know that i have to jump...Sweetness.