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Post by nigella on May 31, 2009 8:38:31 GMT -5
It seems a rarerity these days that your first girlfreind or boyfreind is the only love of your life.
For example my mother and father have been together for 35 years and my dad was my mothers only love.
Bring back the romantic old fashinoned times.
Although saying that i do no of a couple i went to school with who are still a couple now.
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Post by r on Jun 6, 2009 14:37:32 GMT -5
My parents divorced when I was 7. My mom remarried and my dad hasn't seen any women since.
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Post by nigella on Jun 8, 2009 15:50:25 GMT -5
It would seem your dad perhaps has more of the old fasiohned values.I knew someone like that and they never remarried either.
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Post by GoldenRose82 on Jul 21, 2009 3:00:02 GMT -5
Back a long time ago, in the days that the majority of people would stay with their first love for their entire life, divorce wasn't thought very highly of. Plus marriage wasn't always necessarily meant to be all about love. As long as man had someone to bear him children and raise them, and a woman had a man to take care of her, that was a successful marriage, whether the two were in love or not was not so much the issue then. The modern day perception of a happy relationship/marriage is different though. We want to be with someone whom we are in love with. And I think that true love that lasts a life time for both people is extremely rare. Usually at least one half of the couple loses interest, or they get bored and want that intensity that comes with a new relationship, so they start cheating. And divorce isn't frowned upon so much anymore, so people no longer feel they have to either stay in a unhappy marriage or risk becoming a social outcast. I think those things are why happy 10+ year relationships are not so common these days. Just because a couple does stay married for a long time doesn't always make it "romantic" though. I know people who've been married 20, 30 years and aren't really happy in their relationship. Sure they may still care about the other person as a friend, but they're just not really in love anymore. Despite that, numerous things stop them from getting divorced and finding someone new. Some feel they won't be able to make it on their own financially. Some feel that they're just too old to start over, and that it would be too difficult. Some feel that even though it's not a great marriage, it's at least better than being alone. Plus old things tend to feel more comfortable than new things. And then unfortunately some couples stay together out of fear, because one of the people is abusive/controlling. Out of all of the 10+ year marriages I know of, they all fall into one of the above categories. My parents were married 20 some years, but that was only because my dad wanted me to be raised in a two parent household, so he waited until I turned 18 before filing for a divorce even though he couldn't stand my mom, and was actually wanting a divorce before I was even conceived.  Your parents are extremely lucky to have found that rare, life time kind of love in each other. There aren't many people in the world that get to experience it, and have the person they love all their life feel the same all of theirs... |
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1one1
New Member
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Post by 1one1 on Aug 20, 2009 21:54:26 GMT -5
You make a good point, GoldenRose82. I agree with you. I really feel that alot of people don't know what true love is. They say it, but do they even ever stop to define what love is. I've ask people(even my own parents)what does love mean to them?Let me tell you, NON of them could give me an answer. What kind of society did I grow up in where people can't define what they say? No wonder there's alot of failed relationships.
But in the end, who am I to blame? I'm like everyone else, still learning. I just happen to be more of a thinker and ask the bigger questions in life. Even if it is basic questions people never thought of asking themselves. At least the people around me.
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Post by MrNice on Aug 21, 2009 10:21:00 GMT -5
most people do think about the bigger questions in life - it just so happens that there there are no answers
things often seem obvious when you are not involved - but when you are in that same situation all of a sudden everything is not so clear anymore
the biggest issue is that thinking about these things does not mean that your quality of life will be any better
you might think about what true love is all you want and still have a miserable love life while someone that doesn't bother with these questions does better
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1one1
New Member
Posts: 26
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Post by 1one1 on Aug 22, 2009 19:43:23 GMT -5
Oh, I agree. I just wish that I wasn't so much of a constant thinker. Although my constant thoughts now days are making me into a better person. Good point though.
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