TEXTTEXThey i have this problem i always have talking to someone , i mean im less shy then i use to but the problem that i have now is sometimes when i talk to people i can think of alot of things to talk about but other times i have nothing at all to talk about , i hate it so much cause then people probaly see me as a quiet and shy person and i want everyone to know that im not as shy anymore that i can talk but my only problem is comming up with things to talk about. anyone have the same problem?
-im not shy, i just don't wanna talk to a cold, mean judgemental person like you. lol
-just cause i don't say anything alot people think i am shy, maybe i don't wanna talk or can't think of anything to talk about!
I think everybody, even the most extrovert people, - experience that sometimes. Drying up happens to me now and again. Last Saturday night I was in next door having a glass of wine or two with the girl who lives there whom I know pretty well.
About halfway through the night a friend of hers called in. The girl who owns the house was on the phone for almost half an hour and I found myself struggling now and then to keep the conversation going with this other girl.
I always have a set of topics on stanby just in case like the weather, whats been on TV. When things look like grinding to a halt I throw one in.
when that happens to me, i usually try to ask questions of the other person (like about their family or what's going on in their life). it can keep the conversation going and takes the stoplight off my for a while.
I was hideously shy for most of my time at secondary school, and yet if someone referred to me as shy, I was horrified. It meant that I was different, and if there's one thing a shy person hates, it's standing out from the crowd. Paradoxically, I'm less shy now and yet don't mind being referred to as shy. As far as general conversation goes, a lot of it is about confidence, not about what you say. I used to go to the pub regularly, and I was generally happy in small groups, but if I was left one to one with someone who wasn't a close friend, I'd sort of panic and completely dry up. I've learnt that at work I feel more comfortable saying nothing, than appearing desperate to say anything. In some situations, like at work, if people know you're not going to say much, they can get used to it and accept it. If possible don't worry about being thought shy, that's only one aspect of someone.
Last Edit: Jun 3, 2003 15:06:08 GMT -5 by Mildman1