How to meet women, if there's no opportunities?

[peterseter3]

I"m they shyest person in the world and I"m a bad speaker but today i decided to do the unthinkable
well i've done it before but not as much as I did today. I dont know if you guys have ever tried this but it works. and it's easy especially if you have something in common...which would be you are learninng their language or you're interested in their country etc.

I decided to go to the bus terminal where ther'es many people and i decided to talk to foreign girls( the sweet kind looking, not the aggresive kind).
Yeah i target them because it's easy to talk to them plus i know their culture cause i've studied abit. So i was walking around until i saw a group of them.. but they seemed to be with a guy so i gave up. i could hear they were chinese and kinda loud so i gave up.

but then i walked around then came back, there was a beauty sitting all alone. I went in and sat next to her talked to her..asked her about her city, etc, wheere she's from etc. then went in for the question . "You want to meet some other time and talk like now.?" She said yes. we exchanged email and phone number. hehehe
Great

Then after she left i hang around..walked around the block, came back, then i saw another girl. talked to her. said hi.. but she was really shy and thought i was a playboy or something trying to pickher up.. so i saw she was kind of geting annoyed.. and then she just left to her bus. too bad.
i'm a nice person, just sometimes some girls are shyer than i am. So it's not my fault.

Then, i walked around again, came back and i saw this group of 2 walking, and coming to seat in a bench. I faked that i needed the time. what time is it? Then i started a conversation. it was nice. they were also shy so it was kinda hard. It wasn't my fault. they just seemed to have no interest or experience talking to strangers. so everytime i said something.. then they answered but then they turned to eachother and started talking to eachther.

***
And everytime i talked to all those girls. i asked them if they were in my city for long or just a short time. MOst of them said just 2 weeks or at the end of the month they would leave back to their country. So i knew not to pull out my "let's be friends" question. I only do that one if they said they'll be here for months or years.

anyways, wow. it was awesome.
I hope that sexy girl from CHina will respond.

I dn't know if you guys have tried talking to foreigners like this, but i gootta say it's so much easier , at least for me, than talking to American girls. I guess it's cause foreigners are something pretty rare in their country so they're interested.

[Karen]

Mar 7, 2011 22:59:35 GMT -5 peterseter3 said:

but she was really shy and thought i was a playboy or something trying to pickher up..

You were trying to pick her up But good job on having the guts to approach a person.... errr, or people, like that.

The thing about approaching girls who are out and about is that, frankly, we get defensive and uncomfortable sometimes. Its just that all girls tend to get inundated by both nice, and not so nice guys. All too often there are creepy guys who are out there (or online) ruining it for the rest of you.

I think if you approach a stranger in the correct way (non-threatening, and not overly flirty) then it may work.
As a girl though, I will be honest with you and say its very hard to trust strangers enough to give them much chance. It sounds harsh, but try to see it through a girls eyes: all our lives we're told how dangerous strange men are, how many poor girls have been hurt or worse etc. Add to that, that alot of men who approach you act as if you should be crawling into bed with them that minute, and it all adds up to nice guys getting lumped in with the not so nice ones.
Its not fair I know, nice guys tend to get things ruined for them ALOT. So I will say, sincerely, good luck to any of you nice guys trying to meet people like this.

[peterseter3]

Yeah Karen. thanks for the insight. I understand what you mean. there's bad men out there. but i always hope someone will understand me and so far I've found some girls that weren's scare of me.

so far i found one good friend. the girl i have had a date with she's still my great friend.
and then, this one i met today, hopefully she will respond to my email that i just sent right now^^
and if she keeps in touch. that would be nice.

[Karen]

I hope she responds to your email too
I think its all in how you approach a girl as to whether or not she'll be cool with it. I've had guys come up and talk to me that I instantly liked, all I can say about them is that each one was very friendly and didn't immediately start talking about dates or anything like that. And from your earlier post you seemed to do the same with the girl on the bench, so looks like you've got a good idea of how to handle things

[1229]

As a girl though, I will be honest with you and say its very hard to trust strangers enough to give them much chance.

Agreed. It's really hard to weed out the nice and normal people from the dangerous ones. And it's really sad, but in today's world (at least to me) friendliness out of nowhere usually comes off as creepiness.

If you've found a way to meet people then good for you. But just know that an unresponsive girl isn't necessarily shy. She just has her guard up and rightfully so.

[peterseter3]

Hi guys. well today i decided to do it again. just sit in the bus station and see if i could find a girl to talk to.
and yup. i did it again!!!

of course, lik ei said before i try with quiet asian foreigners(not the loud ones). It's so much easier than with americans.

So i saw this girl. she looked nice and friendly. i made eye contact and smiled, then said hello and moved in and sat next to her..
WHICH by the way was a bit of a challenge cause an asian guy was just a few feet from her( they weren't together).
so i had to sit in between, but well i did it

and it worked. awesome conversation.
but of course like most that i've met, she's just here for 3 weeks and this is her last week.

although it's so fun and easy to make friends with foreigners, mostt of them are just here for short so it's kinda sad

[putter65]

Well done !

Hopefully soon you will make some good friends.

[Sweet Pea]

people willing to travel around the world may be more open to stranger conversation. good idea!