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Post by peterseter3 on Jan 1, 2011 0:40:46 GMT -5
It seems you have to either have a great picture or have a great career and be super successful. I've had examples of both
1. put picture, nobody emailed me
2. Be myself in my profile, girls are not interested( I'm sure it's cause i'm not super professional etc) and i'm not social.
But also Plentyof fish and OKCupid are free and yet seems the girls are picky as hell. Nobody answers, . I think if these sites worked, we shy guys would be able to make real friends and dates easily..but not gonna happen as long as women are as picky as they are.
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Post by Scotty on Jan 1, 2011 1:50:49 GMT -5
I haven't had any luck on those sites either.
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Post by Tal on Jan 1, 2011 5:06:59 GMT -5
Yes, I've experience this too sadly. It's very demoralising to constantly be ignored or have your messages deleted unread, but I think you just have to keep messaging more people and hopefully one or two will respond. In the end all you need is one girl to like you out of the dozens or hundreds you try to talk to.
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Post by timarends on Jan 2, 2011 23:34:41 GMT -5
it's hard if your shyness keeps you from getting a good paying job, because a lot of women who are looking for a stable relationship want someone who is making a decent income in case they decide to have a family. So shyness makes it harder to meet the opposite sex and also makes it harder to get a good job. It's kind of a vicious cycle. Maybe you could focus on people who share your interests, like tennis, art, etc.
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gals
Full Member
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Post by gals on Jan 6, 2011 8:04:09 GMT -5
So shyness makes it harder to meet the opposite sex and also makes it harder to get a good job. It's kind of a vicious cycle. Hi tim. I'm a shy person myself and I try to overcome my shyness just to have a job. I think shyness is not enough reason to not get a job. I just think that if I don't have a job, how can I feed myself? That alone, is even a logical and normal motivation than just getting dates. Now, that only comes secondary. I think if a girl saw someone with a job, she'll consider him than someone who doesn't even have one. Just my 2 cents |
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 11, 2011 20:19:21 GMT -5
I don't know much about dating sites but I think there might be something you're not considering.
Women can get a huge number of emails within just a week of signing up. The women you have written to could just be overwhelmed with emails and have never even seen your emails.
Unfortunately the whole dating world is extremely competitive and dating sites are even more competitive than meeting someplace like a bar.
I wish I could give you some advice on meeting women, but I don't have any.
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Post by peterseter3 on Jan 11, 2011 23:43:39 GMT -5
rylak yeah thanks for the info.. Yeah i'm sure they get lots of messages but they neever answer never.
If women are so picky online, they never gonna get anything out of joining the site.
They dont answer cause you dont' put a photo. when you do, they dont answer cause you're ugly.
if they answer even you're ugly, they then not interested cause you're not a good speaker.
Anyways recently i checked out a dating book from library. But Seems most dating books/articles are meant for people who are good speakers already.
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Post by spacecapsule on Mar 6, 2011 18:27:00 GMT -5
It seems you have to either have a great picture or have a great career and be super successful. I've had examples of both 1. put picture, nobody emailed me 2. Be myself in my profile, girls are not interested( I'm sure it's cause i'm not super professional etc) and i'm not social. But also Plentyof fish and OKCupid are free and yet seems the girls are picky as hell. Nobody answers, . I think if these sites worked, we shy guys would be able to make real friends and dates easily..but not gonna happen as long as women are as picky as they are. I agree with the points that you made as I have experienced the same pitfalls when I dabbled in online dating. Also, I will add that if you do not have some sort of "social proof" on your profile you are doomed from the beginning. By social proof I mean listing relatively exciting group activities or posting pictures of you engaged in activities. In other words, the webcam picture of yourself generally will not cut it. |
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Post by cyclopse on Mar 21, 2011 0:57:58 GMT -5
I actually have had relatively good success on dating site. I have never been on ok cupid but I have been able to get some dates on POF as well as Match.com, and yes the girls that I have talk to have been rather good looking and successful. I think the problem I have into is the distance factor.
As far not getting emails, I think it just comes down to a numbers game. The more you send out the better chance you have to get one back. I also noticed that I usually get more emails when I have already recieved one.
Your picture is a big deal too, I started to get alot more emails when I put one up of myself going whitewater rafting with some friends.
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