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Post by Scotty on Mar 26, 2014 14:17:09 GMT -5
You'll get it next time! Congrats on making progress at least. I was always scared of driving when I started learning, and I failed the test twice (on really nitpicky reasons if you ask me,lol). Glad to hear you're doing okay and I look forward to good news.
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Post by Grayback on Mar 27, 2014 13:23:32 GMT -5
Thanks Scotty, I also felt ( and still do but to a much lesser extent thankfully ) fearful each time I had a driving lesson coming, the stress was making it harder for me than it should have been. Like you said though, it's good to make progress, you kind of feel better about yourself don't you ?
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Post by Strawberry on Mar 30, 2014 20:44:30 GMT -5
Good for you, Grayback. Sounds like you've got a pretty good attitude, which is something important to have. I hated driving initially, though it's pretty much a requirement to learn out where I am at. I put it off for a year, whereas everyone else did it right away, because they were so excited about it. And now...driving...it is like, one of my favorite things to do (although there are few :S). To be out on the open road, to crank up the tunes...I find it to be extremely liberating, personally. Good luck for next time.
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Post by Grayback on Mar 31, 2014 14:15:12 GMT -5
Good for you, Grayback. Sounds like you've got a pretty good attitude, which is something important to have. As hard as it can be for someone like me who falls so easily prey to depression, I find that having this attitude does help a fair bit in my day to day life. I hated driving initially, though it's pretty much a requirement to learn out where I am at. I put it off for a year, whereas everyone else did it right away, because they were so excited about it. It's hasn't been too much of a requirement for me before because I've been taking the bus to work during these many years but I've gotten kind of tired of that, I need to be less dependent on others if I want to make any kind of progress in my life. And now...driving...it is like, one of my favorite things to do (although there are few :S). To be out on the open road, to crank up the tunes...I find it to be extremely liberating, personally. Yeah, I can definitely see that now, I'm really looking forward to be able to drive on my own, driving your own car is a bit like being in your own personal bubble, it's kind of a private space in a way. Good luck for next time. Thank you very much for your encouragement Strawberry .
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Post by Grayback on May 7, 2014 14:27:03 GMT -5
Well, I've had my second try at the practical exam yesterday and it went very poorly I'm afraid, much more so than my first try which was pretty good apart from the speed limit issue. Bear with me as I share my frustrations in this post, this is pretty much the only place I can do this and I really feel the need to vent said frustrations. I first thought about writing something yesterday evening but I had a feeling I should let a day pass in order to gain just a little bit more of a perspective. Of course, being a human being like any other and as such, subject to the many flaws we suffer from, my first reaction to this failure is to put the blame on something else than myself. To be fair though, I do believe there were factors that facilitated this failure, even though the mistakes I've made were by my hand.
First, there was the rather long waiting time before it was my turn ( about 45 minutes ) which, for someone like me, is torture, not because of the waiting itself but what happens in that time i.e doubts, questions, hesitations and, of course, feeding on all of that, stress and all the problems it can cause.
Secondly, the inspector was the complete opposite of the one I had during my first try. While the first was completely silent for the whole time ( except for giving directions obviously ) the second was engaged in casual conversation with the person at the back of the car for the entirety of the exam. I felt frustrated, wondering what I was doing here and it made it more difficult for me to concentrate on the road.
Lastly, and this is directly connected to the second factor, I think from the very start there was a misunderstanding between the inspector and myself. You see, my moniteur told me early on in my lessons that I wasn't the first shy person to learn from him and so he had good advice to give me among which is the idea of saying things you're thinking out loud ( for example, noticing a sign or a danger, etc ) and that has helped me quite a bit actually. The thing is, this inspector didn't seem to realize or understand why I did this. To give you an example, she asked me to turn right as soon as possible ( which generally means that you can't turn right immediately because it's a one-way street or whatever ) and so I see the sign which forbids you from turning right and I say it out loud. To that she answered that "Of course you can't turn right, that's why I said as soon as possible in the first place..." So I'm afraid she thought that when I said that out loud, I was accusing her of giving wrong directions when in fact I said that because it helped me make the right decision...
Of course, all these factors played a role in my failure but, as I mentioned earlier in this post, the mistakes I made were my own and the frustration I feel is mostly directed at myself. What I fear the most right now is having to do this exam a third time, I don't feel up to it anymore and I'm afraid I'm going to fail once again and feel humiliated in the process...
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Post by Grayback on Aug 11, 2014 13:43:39 GMT -5
I've often mentioned in here how quickly time passes but I feel like I never really elaborated too much on it. I've been wondering about it lately a fair bit. I mean I don't really have much reason to complain right now, I've done better for myself these last few months than I have in the past few years but even then, I can't help but feel that I'm not doing enough with the time I have at my disposition. I'm going to turn 27 in a few days from now, meaning that it's been nine years since I've been out of the educational system. What have I got to show for it ? Not much unfortunately and I'm not just talking about my job but everything else as well : a nonexistent love life, a social life that could best be described as virtual and I could probably go on and on about my failures. Of course, that is all connected to my extreme shyness/social anxiety but I've written quite enough about that already, I want to focus purely on the idea of time lost.
And, indeed, I have wasted a lot of time already since nine years is quite a significant amount of time. I will never get these years back and I cannot say for certain that the next nine years will be spent more wisely. I like to believe I'm a fairly intelligent human being, in fact that's pretty much the only quality I've ever recognized in myself. Yet it would seem my intelligence is not enough to make progress in my life nor is it high enough to be called an achievement all by itself. Where does that leave me ? Nowhere, or rather nowhere I'd like to be. What's strange to me is that I've always felt like I lacked ambition and yet, what I've just written in the previous sentence proves that I'm wrong about this as well ( and about so many other things but let's cross that bridge later ). I don't want to be rich but I'd like to have enough money to live comfortably. I do not want to be famous but I would like people to recognize that I have some worth as an individual. I would like to be more knowledgeable on a wide range of subjects. I would like to be a wiser man and to be able to find some answers to questions I've been asking myself for a long time.
The question is, how do I make the most of the time I have left when I don't know how much time I have left ? It's like some sort of equation that you can't solve because you're missing a key variable. So instead I'll just continue to live as I always have, day to day, pretending not to care about either past or future. Yet I do care and I do worry as I'm sure many people do. What does the future hold for me ? Where will I be 10 years from now ? I don't have any answers and I fear that if someone with magical powers ( let's assume those exist for the purpose of this train of thought ) would tell me everything about my future life I would not like what that person would have to tell me.
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Post by missklew on Aug 12, 2014 5:50:00 GMT -5
The question is, how do I make the most of the time I have left when I don't know how much time I have left ? It's like some sort of equation that you can't solve because you're missing a key variable. So instead I'll just continue to live as I always have, day to day, pretending not to care about either past or future. Yet I do care and I do worry as I'm sure many people do. What does the future hold for me ? Where will I be 10 years from now ? I don't have any answers and I fear that if someone with magical powers ( let's assume those exist for the purpose of this train of thought ) would tell me everything about my future life I would not like what that person would have to tell me. Wait until you are 50 and the time really has flown by! My advice is to make a bucket list of things you want to do and do them starting now. Find something to be a part of, to be involved in. I didn't even really get started having fun until I was 40. Don't wait like I did.
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Post by Outcast on Aug 12, 2014 10:31:41 GMT -5
I think i can relate with the things you have mentioned Grayback. I don't usually think that far ahead of the future. I think thinking about the future too much can cause anybody to worry and care. I do believe there is great benefit if we can learn to use our time more wisely and effectively though. I usually find that i get more things done if i make a schedule and plan the things i want to do for the day as opposed to just doing the things i want when i want to/ on impulse. I think this is somewhat similar to Strawberry's rant of not knowing what you want. For me, what i try to do to get a more clearer picture of what i want to do today or for the future, is to try to make a list of these things in a notepad ( more particularly a note app in my case. ). I then review this list sometimes, and try to schedule and plan things to try and reach them. Of course, it can't be helped that sometimes things don't go always go as planned. That doesn't mean you can't try and go for it the next day or so. Strangely enough, i do notice that socializing or planning to marry isn't among those i prioritize at the moment. Maybe that's why i try to fit in at least socializing/helping other people out sometimes. Like today for instance. Anyway like Missklew said, you're still pretty young. Try to make the most of your time today according to what you want.
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Post by Grayback on Aug 13, 2014 13:07:10 GMT -5
Missklew and Outcast, thank you both for your kind words and good advice. I do realize that it's not too late for me and in theory, I should still have a good amount of time left to improve my life. The difficulty lies, as is always has, in getting out of my comfort zone. You're right in saying that this is somewhat similar to what Strawberry wrote in her own post Outcast. The fact is, I have always had trouble knowing what I really want or in fact what I require to find a certain fulfillment that I seem to lack in my life. I guess that means I should find out what it is I really need and then focus my time accordingly. Easier said than done but like they say, nothing worthwhile ever is...
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Post by Grayback on Sept 18, 2014 12:53:22 GMT -5
Well, I'm delighted to say that for once, I've got some good news to share with you guys. I finally got my driving license ! I guess it's true what they say, the third time's a/the charm . I don't really have anything else to say, I'm just really happy and looking forward to all the possibilities this will open up for me.
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Post by puppet on Sept 18, 2014 13:58:49 GMT -5
Let's ride into the sunlight! Congrats for the driving license!
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Post by Sexy Spork #37 on Sept 18, 2014 18:14:31 GMT -5
Well, I'm delighted to say that for once, I've got some good news to share with you guys. I finally got my driving license ! I guess it's true what they say, the third time's a/the charm . I don't really have anything else to say, I'm just really happy and looking forward to all the possibilities this will open up for me. Three times?! God, only took me one... No, I'm kidding, congrats. Drive safe, honey...
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Post by Zoe on Sept 18, 2014 18:20:04 GMT -5
Congratulations Grayback, *cheers* hope you have many more new adventures and experiences in the near future.
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Post by Grayback on Sept 20, 2014 7:10:20 GMT -5
Thanks everyone, your kind words are very much appreciated .
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Post by Scotty on Sept 20, 2014 12:58:15 GMT -5
Congrats Grayback!
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