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Post by Richard Cunningham on Oct 1, 2006 0:36:25 GMT -5
Would you screw around with someone else while in a relationship? Couples in a loving, honest relationship probably share his and her towels. Others who screw around with anyone probably share his and her-pes.  What on earth has adultery got to do with anything? This thread is about two single adults having sex while being friends. My post was about why you have insulted and upset me. If you don't want to talk to me about that then fine. I would ask you though not to insult me further by trying to steer the conversation onto something completely unrelated. If sex has as much value as a handshake, surely shaking someone elses "hand" while in a relationship is okay? I'm having some difficulty understanding what sex means to you, if anything. It's something I reserve for someone I care about. I think that makes it something special. I'm unsure as to how exactly I've insulted you. Maybe I've labelled people who screw around to be whores, but I do believe that's the definition of a whore  Nearly anything people say san be considered insulting. If I posted saying "I hate nazis!!!!", I would be insulting nazi sympathisers (there are quite a few shy nazis on ASS). |
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Post by pnoopiepnats on Oct 1, 2006 6:26:11 GMT -5
pnats - so you are a closed off person and don't bond with people easily other, more open and trusting people can form bonds much faster this doesn't mean that your values are better then theirs So open and trusting = promiscuous? And i imagine a slew of the fast seduction lines would make someone trust you more so you can get their panties off faster. |
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Post by pnoopiepnats on Oct 1, 2006 6:35:05 GMT -5
Maybe we should all have our bodies gilded and enshrined, and charge entrance fees to stand in their presence? Personally I cherish my every skin flake and shed hair, and keep them in a bejeweled vial on my windowsill. Value value value. How much love equals sex? Can you give us the market value of a kiss, just so we don't sell our precious bodies short and lose... what is it we lose? If valuing our bodies is so important, I would venture to say that eating junk food or not exercising is far more reproachable than enjoying an evening with a member of the opposite sex. Although this seems to be less about helping other people lead self-respecting lives and more about proving that people who don't share your antiquated views on sex are amoral and dishonest. So I gather that you and your bf have an open relationship? That your regularly have sex with friends. |
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Post by pnoopiepnats on Oct 1, 2006 6:41:27 GMT -5
Pap, not sure why you are so offended by anything I say?
Why do you care what I say? You are going to do whatever you want to do regardless of what I say so why get bent out of shape about it?
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Post by phoenixferret on Oct 1, 2006 7:51:20 GMT -5
Maybe we should all have our bodies gilded and enshrined, and charge entrance fees to stand in their presence? Personally I cherish my every skin flake and shed hair, and keep them in a bejeweled vial on my windowsill. Value value value. How much love equals sex? Can you give us the market value of a kiss, just so we don't sell our precious bodies short and lose... what is it we lose? If valuing our bodies is so important, I would venture to say that eating junk food or not exercising is far more reproachable than enjoying an evening with a member of the opposite sex. Although this seems to be less about helping other people lead self-respecting lives and more about proving that people who don't share your antiquated views on sex are amoral and dishonest. So I gather that you and your bf have an open relationship? That your regularly have sex with friends. If I say this has nothing whatsoever to do with the matter at hand, something tells me it will fly straight over your head. To make this clear, I choose to be monogamous in a relationship. That's how I like it. I prefer the color green; cocoa crispies for breakfast; and monogamous relationships. Amazingly I am able to maintain my preferences while still approving of and harboring no ill will toward people who prefer purple, pancakes, and open relationships. I'm just so complex that way. As to intercourse outside of a relationship, it seems that neither you nor your BF can come up with a single good reason as to why it is "wrong" or disrespectful to one's body to have casual sex. Is this a religious thing, or does Richie just really enjoy using the word "whore?" A note to Richie: I think you would, at this point, fit the definition of a few unpleasant monickers which thus far people seem to manage not to use. You two may need to get SS back in here to argue the case for the smug and casual use of the term "whore." Kind of an unexpected little irony. Even more interesting is that by his definition both of you, Richie and Pnats, are sluts/whores/sexually promiscuos deviants with morality issues. |
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Post by pnoopiepnats on Oct 1, 2006 8:11:21 GMT -5
If I say this has nothing whatsoever to do with the matter at hand, something tells me it will fly straight over your head. To make this clear, I choose to be monogamous in a relationship. That's how I like it. I prefer the color green; cocoa crispies for breakfast; and monogamous relationships. Amazingly I am able to maintain my preferences while still approving of and harboring no ill will toward people who prefer purple, pancakes, and open relationships. I'm just so complex that way. As to intercourse outside of a relationship, it seems that neither you nor your BF can come up with a single good reason as to why it is "wrong" or disrespectful to one's body to have casual sex. Is this a religious thing, or does Richie just really enjoy using the word "whore?" A note to Richie: I think you would, at this point, fit the definition of a few unpleasant monickers which thus far people seem to manage not to use. You two may need to get SS back in here to argue the case for the smug and casual use of the term "whore." Kind of an unexpected little irony. Even more interesting is that by his definition both of you, Richie and Pnats, are sluts/whores/sexually promiscuos deviants with morality issues. And you Ferret just like to argue for the sake of arguing. The world as defined by SS, how fun! I stand by my views that sex is best reserved for 2 people in love. |
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Post by MrNice on Oct 1, 2006 11:20:20 GMT -5
open and trusting = something that you don't understand
thats fine - except you judge people that don't hold your point of view as having no values, not valuing their body ect etc
i don't think sex needs to be reserved - given an opportunity, if i want to have sex i will have sex
i could build some values around being shy, given that i am uncomfortable with people early on and say that other people that don't have this problem are whores, however its not really about values
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Post by skyhint on Oct 1, 2006 17:26:22 GMT -5
I wonder... What IS the difference between a lover and a friend if not the benefits?
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Post by nats on Oct 1, 2006 17:50:20 GMT -5
I wonder... What IS the difference between a lover and a friend if not the benefits? i always wonder that, i think it's pretty muhc usually a get out clause so the guy doesn't have to get serious and can see other peopel (or the girl if it's the girls idea) i think people have a right to do what they want though. And there are times when you like someone in a purely sexual way- not wanthing anything else. |
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Post by phoenixferret on Oct 1, 2006 18:04:24 GMT -5
If I say this has nothing whatsoever to do with the matter at hand, something tells me it will fly straight over your head. To make this clear, I choose to be monogamous in a relationship. That's how I like it. I prefer the color green; cocoa crispies for breakfast; and monogamous relationships. Amazingly I am able to maintain my preferences while still approving of and harboring no ill will toward people who prefer purple, pancakes, and open relationships. I'm just so complex that way. As to intercourse outside of a relationship, it seems that neither you nor your BF can come up with a single good reason as to why it is "wrong" or disrespectful to one's body to have casual sex. Is this a religious thing, or does Richie just really enjoy using the word "whore?" A note to Richie: I think you would, at this point, fit the definition of a few unpleasant monickers which thus far people seem to manage not to use. You two may need to get SS back in here to argue the case for the smug and casual use of the term "whore." Kind of an unexpected little irony. Even more interesting is that by his definition both of you, Richie and Pnats, are sluts/whores/sexually promiscuos deviants with morality issues. And you Ferret just like to argue for the sake of arguing. Bullshit. I only argue for the things I really believe in, and I firmly believe that you are wrong and are having great fun airing your egotism. The world as defined by Pants and Richie--now THAT is something to get excited about! Bully for you. I may think ice cream is "best" in a cone, but I'd have to be a very narrow-minded person to condemn someone else for eating it in a dish. I stand by my view that you are simply parroting things your momma told you long, long ago, without actually pausing to consider anything outside of what you think you know. |
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ty78
Full Member
Posts: 188
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Post by ty78 on Oct 2, 2006 5:49:15 GMT -5
I'll have sex whenever the hell I feel like it if the opportunity arises. I guess that puts me in the whore category. You can call me immoral but I can tell you I'm far more tolerant and respectful to people than 90% of the christians in this world. I've never cheated on a girlfriend ever.
If some sexually repressed bible thumper doesn't like it well... they can pray for me but I can assure you I won't be going to some ficticious lake of fire. What I will have though is one more experience in this short life than they do.
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Post by pnoopiepnats on Oct 2, 2006 6:01:43 GMT -5
I wonder... What IS the difference between a lover and a friend if not the benefits? Probably exclusivity. I think FWB means 'I like you enough to screw you and I'm horny and lonely but I'm still looking for something else and that something else isn't you, so don't get attached.' |
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Post by Samantha on Oct 2, 2006 9:00:27 GMT -5
If sex has as much value as a handshake, surely shaking someone elses "hand" while in a relationship is okay? I'm having some difficulty understanding what sex means to you, if anything. It's something I reserve for someone I care about. I think that makes it something special. I'm unsure as to how exactly I've insulted you. Maybe I've labelled people who screw around to be whores, but I do believe that's the definition of a whore Nearly anything people say san be considered insulting. If I posted saying "I hate nazis!!!!", I would be insulting nazi sympathisers (there are quite a few shy nazis on ASS). What sex means to me is irrelevant as to why you feel the need to be insulting. So far I fail to see the connection between what sex means to you and how it justifies your insults. Nobody here is criticising your beliefs, so why the need to criticise others? You can quite easily discuss why you don't think it is such a good idea without being insulting. You sincerely don't understand how you have been insulting? You don't understand how offensive it is to be called "filthy horny ratbag scum" or a "shitbag"? You don't understand that whore is a derogatory term and not a technical one? I seriously doubt this Richie, you are smarter than that. There is a difference between considering something offensive and being deliberately offensive. I believe you to of been deliberately offensive. There is a difference between sympathising with a movement that killed millions of innocent people, who wanted to wipe out entire races of people and sympathising with two friends who have mutually agreed to have no strings attached sex with each other. Pap, not sure why you are so offended by anything I say? Why do you care what I say? You are going to do whatever you want to do regardless of what I say so why get bent out of shape about it? I can be offended by things people say because I'm human and have feelings. Do you think you can just say anything you like and expect people not to be offended? I don't like being told I am "filthy ratbag scum", a "shitbag" or that I have no values, that I am not a 'good' person. It has nothing to do with me doing whatever I want to do. It is about you doing what you have done. Or more specifically you saying what you have said. I certainly don't expect people to agree with me. I certainly don't expect people with other beliefs not to say anything. What I do expect is anyone that does not agree to say so in a reasonably polite manner. I don't mind people expressing their emotional reaction to something but I do mind when it involves personal insults. If you two don't give a damn that you've offended me then fine but please don't pretend you've been all sweetness and light. Calling someone filthy, calling someone a ratbag, calling someone scum, calling someone a shitbag, calling someone a whore, saying someone has no values are all pretty recognisably offensive. I challenge you to walk around town and call strangers these things. See if I'm the only one who finds them offensive or not. I'm willing to bet the vast majority of them would find it insulting. |
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Post by Samantha on Oct 2, 2006 10:16:34 GMT -5
I wonder... What IS the difference between a lover and a friend if not the benefits? i always wonder that, i think it's pretty muhc usually a get out clause so the guy doesn't have to get serious and can see other peopel (or the girl if it's the girls idea) I don't really see how it is a get out clause. There is nothing to get out of. It isn't a romantic relationship, it's a platonic one. I think I can see where you are coming from but a friends relationship is different to a romantic one in more ways than just sex. You feel differently about someone you are in love with to someone you love. You behave differently in a romantic relationship than a platonic one. The time spent together is spent differently and so on. Also I don't think it's about just one person wanting this but about both. A FWB situation should be one where both people know exactly where they stand and wanting the same thing. It is a mutual situation to me. |
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theo
New Member
Posts: 8
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Post by theo on Oct 24, 2006 14:44:20 GMT -5
Well I went through a stage of having sex for the sake of it, I thought why not,... I might as well gain experience. And I did, I gained huge amounts from different people. It wasn't meaningless, it meant a great deal to me, and i'm glad I went through that phase of exploration, i'm more content. I think if I was me now - 21, but a virgin or very inexperienced, with no experience at all, wondering, wondering, wondering all the time, regretting countless opportunities, i'd be much more unhappy than I am...
But i'm not saying just go sleep around, because I did kinda hate myself for it at the time, and I actually got very depressed over it all. But now i'm glad I did. - oh.. and by the way none of these people were 'good' friends, they were friends of friends.
All of the 'relationships' I had could have easily ended up as long-term relationships, but I didn't want that. So usually they were started by the girl and ended by me.
At the end of the day, do what you feel is right, forget the morals and values of others, they're bullshit, and I really mean that, it's your life, it's your decision. Some people are so short sighted. We each have an instinctive part of ourselves that tells us if what we are doing is right or wrong, don't let anyone else's differing views affect that.
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