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Post by Samantha on Jun 9, 2005 18:09:41 GMT -5
Is is it a choice, I dont think same sex attraction is a choice per se , but acting on it is. Sorry I missed this reply. I'm a bit scatty sometimes. I accept that peole can see homosexuality as a choice is sinful. I disagree with it but it's their choice. That's what I was debating, the question of choice. Just a shame that to love another human being is wrong. It's not like we have an overload of love for our fellow man but there you go. |
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Post by Samantha on Jun 9, 2005 18:22:24 GMT -5
my moral views on the topic are irrelevant Never underestimate how important a person's moral viewpoints affect everything they do. What is more important than a person's morals? Espescially science. Even more especially psychology. Psychology is a pseudo-science governed by opinion. More important these opinions govern the destiny of peoples lives. A serial rapist, child abuser or in fact any criminal will be released if even they themselves say they will reoffend. A mad person though (governed by peoples views of what is mad or not - which is almost as subjective as Art) can be imprissoned, drugged, electrocuted, indefinately for a crime they MAY commit, even if they never have done before. Or even if they might hurt themselves even though suicide is perfectly legal. Psychology prides itself on the fact that it changed peoples' view on madness so people are 'mad' not 'bad' while in truth maybe in this day and age the reverse would be better. To me, why someone would call someone mentally ill is of the upmost importance. Nergh, Arthur Schopenhauer put it best: "The discovery of truth is prevented more effectively, not by the false appearance things present and which mislead into error, not directly by weakness of the reasoning powers, but by preconceived opinion, by prejudice. " Personal peev over, sorry. |
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Post by Crashtastic on Jun 9, 2005 19:19:25 GMT -5
Oooo clipping nose hair always turns me on  |
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Post by Kitten on Jun 9, 2005 21:50:27 GMT -5
Is is it a choice, I dont think same sex attraction is a choice per se , but acting on it is. Just a shame that to love another human being is wrong. It's not like we have an overload of love for our fellow man but there you go. So true, papadancer. Of all the things to worry about in this world, people worry that we love the wrong types of people. *shrug* I just don't understand, and it saddens me frankly. |
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Post by sayoran on Jun 10, 2005 15:33:32 GMT -5
Sorry if I seem selfesh, I really don't want to upset anyone, but no-one seems to have given me any advice on my dilemma (except shypsychologyguy and Stawberrysweetie  , after all, I posted to get help for a problem I had with my teacher, and all everyone has done is discuss their opinions on sexuality. I really feel sorry, if I'm being rude  |
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Post by Samantha on Jun 10, 2005 16:28:39 GMT -5
Oh sorry sayoran, no it's not selfish and you're not being rude in the slightest. It's good if you still want advice that you spoke up. That's why this site is here.
Apologies if you think I was ignoring your origional post but I don't seem to have it. The first post I have is shypsychologyguy's reply so I'm not sure what it's about. There seem to of been a few vanishing posts. Not sure if it's just me. Maybe if you post it again?
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Post by sayoran on Jun 10, 2005 17:06:46 GMT -5
thats ok  I wasn't targeting you though, sorry if it came out ok! Basically, i deleted my original post, 'cause i was nervous, but i re-posted it towards the bottom of page one of this topic. Thanks! |
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Post by shypsychologyguy on Jun 10, 2005 22:06:20 GMT -5
I never said sex is a sin.
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Post by pnoopiepnats on Jun 10, 2005 22:20:20 GMT -5
Please help me to help myself, any more comments would be great, and dont worry if you think they'll be harsh, any comments are welcome, thats why im posting, after all. Thank you. I am not sure what you are asking for? If you have an opportunity to study someplace that would benefit you, I'd say go for it. |
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Post by Samantha on Jun 11, 2005 7:46:13 GMT -5
I'm not too sure either. The easy part first. Take the place that was offered to you. You have nothing to gain by staying where you are. Sometimes in life you have to step back emotionally and do what will be best for you in the long run.
As for the feelings you have for your teacher. I stink at this kind of stuff but it's perfectly fine to have crushes on people. From how you describe your feelings, they seem to be about the sort of person he is, maybe the sort of person you wish you were. More like a role model, idol type hero thing. That's all good and perfectly normal/healthy. Especially if you are very lonely, insecure etc. To be able to connect with someone you admire is a massive boost, it kind of validates who you are. It makes the rejection of others etc worth while. It's a light at the end of the tunnel. That's going to create very strong feelings regardless of your sexuality.
However everyone has to learn how to control their feelings. That's one of the hardest things about being young. Maybe that's also why the first cut is the deepest as they say. You've got to be realistic. While it's perfectly natural to become jealous when someone we like turns their attention to other people (we all do it, it's human) we have to accept we can never be the centre of someones attention forever. It's a consequence from making them the focal point of our lifes. While it may be very romantic in books it's unhealthy and unrealistic. Not bad. Not immoral, just not healthy for either person.
This person is your teacher so you have to accept you can never have the relationship with him, sexual or platonic that you want. Pining after it, constantly thinking about it (done that too, it's fine, it's normal) is only going to screw you up. It's the emotional equivelant of bashing your head against a brick wall. Basically you have to move on. Be happy that you have been friends. That you have talked and shared interests. That you have at some point you have made a connection with him. Wish him well and do what's best for you.
Which is taking this place. You have 2 choices.
1) Let your education and potentially your future suffer. While you screw yourself up hoping for something that will not happen or...
2) Do something that will benefit you and that will happen.
To use a cliche, we aren't always dealt the hand we want. We just have to play the cards we have.
Although this is of course just an opinion.
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Post by strawberrysweetie on Jun 12, 2005 8:48:06 GMT -5
If any scientific research should go into changing sexual orientation, it should be directed at those who are sexually attracted to children, which can never be acceptable. Absolutely. I feel that anything that creates victims in the process is wrong. Yeah, I totally agree. Good point, paul. they used to castrate rapists in the old days. I've read that castration doesn't really do much, unless you deny them of taking any testosterone after the procedure. They are still capable of having sex, but I think they just don't have the sperm...something like that. Also, my dad says that a lot of rapists don't do it just for the sex, but they do it because it gives them a sense of power too. So, if that's taken away from them and they hate women or whatever, then they could find other ways to take power, perhaps just by being abusive or turning into a killer. You never know. But even so, I think rapists and child molesters should be castrated and denied any testosterone. Shoot, they should just cut off the whole damn thing! Plus be thrown into jail forever.  Anyway.... |
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Post by shypsychologyguy on Jun 12, 2005 14:27:04 GMT -5
the reason castration doesnt work is that many times rapist dont rape for the pleasure of it its more a psychological thing. Rape and im not talking about typical date rape is often done to gain control of a person or hurt them. because its not all sexual castration is not effective nor ethical.
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Post by wagnerr on Jun 12, 2005 21:25:29 GMT -5
the reason castration doesnt work is that many times rapist dont rape for the pleasure of it its more a psychological thing. Rape and im not talking about typical date rape is often done to gain control of a person or hurt them. because its not all sexual castration is not effective nor ethical. I agree, same goes for sexual harrassment. It's more about power and control than sexual pleasure. Although some people get sexual pleasure out of power, too. |
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Post by Samantha on Jun 13, 2005 7:28:42 GMT -5
Wha? Whe? Huh? Wasn't there a post about stake burning? I must be losing it  *unwraps the tinfoil* |
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Post by strawberrysweetie on Jun 13, 2005 13:52:33 GMT -5
the reason castration doesnt work is that many times rapist dont rape for the pleasure of it its more a psychological thing. Rape and im not talking about typical date rape is often done to gain control of a person or hurt them. Isn't that pretty much what I said? because its not all sexual castration is not effective nor ethical. I don't see it as ethical to allow rapists or molestors out of jail. Most often they're likely to continue on with the same sick crap. |
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, after all, I posted to get help for a problem I had with my teacher, and all everyone has done is discuss their opinions on sexuality.
I wasn't targeting you though, sorry if it came out ok!
*unwraps the tinfoil*