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Post by bella2007 on Dec 4, 2007 5:41:38 GMT -5
TALK TO HER!
Hmmmmm next time she swings her arms back, ask her for the time...if she is wearing a watch, gently touch her wrist and say can i see your watch or just ask her...do you have the time? After that you can even ask her which class she has next?!?
I dunno, just a suggestion :=)
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Post by MrNice on Dec 4, 2007 9:44:36 GMT -5
or let her hit you with her elbow
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Post by bella2007 on Dec 4, 2007 11:33:00 GMT -5
lol :=)
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Post by ball4yourout on Dec 4, 2007 13:37:00 GMT -5
Bella, how are things going with your guy? I have something to tell you and everyone else. I had a very bad experience last night. Very bad. I had monthly meeting at 8, so I went to the meeting, helped clean up, and stuck around for about 10 minutes before finally heading out. On the way back home, I decided to stop by a local grocery store because I wanted to buy some CD-Rs. I figured a drink or two would work as well. So I pull into the parking lot, get out, walk in. I decided to take a stroll around, see if there's anything else I might need that I didn't think of earlier before heading for the CD-Rs. I found nothing and I strolled by a few aisles. I happened to pass a particular aisle and turn my head to my right and look in, and to my utter disbelief, who was standing there? It was HER. As in the girl I've been talking about all this time. And I'm convinced I did not confuse her with anybody else, I recognized her right off the bat. Same hair, same profile, even the same clothing she'd been wearing earlier in the day! Same voice as well. She was doing some shopping with a friend or a roommate. For a moment, I stopped in my tracks to collect myself and try to understand what I just saw. A gazillion thoughts just ran through my head, one of them being "Here's your chance, rookie," another being "You've got somebody looking out for you." Those were my exact thoughts. After that momentary lapse, I gathered up my strength and I did what I always do. Walk away. Keep on walking, pretend I didn't see anything, don't even bother because I'd know I'd screw up big time. I kept walking until I got to the aisle with the CD-Rs. I grabbed a pack, but all of a sudden, I was overcome with emotion and became very self-conscious. I figured if I wasn't even going to make a move or talk to her, there was no point in having her see me there at all. I got really sick and I just had to leave the store, with nothing in hand. I scurried out and went over to a local pharmacy instead, trying to be all casual, act as if nothing happened. I got what I needed. On the drive home, though, I really began to lose it. A part of me felt like I squandered a huge opportunity, the other part of me felt like this was how things were always going to be. I had very mixed feelings. I finally got home, pulled into the driveway, and turned off the car, I couldn't get out. I just sat there, in the darkness. I really felt like crying, but I couldn't. I just felt awful and I really wanted to just punch the steering wheel and just go insane, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I got out, walked upstairs, and proceeded onto the rest of my night. I really don't know how else to put any of this. This is so embarrassing for me. Worst of all, this is not the first time that God or something has literally given me a break, but each time I just throw those breaks away. I don't know. Go ahead, say your worst. I know it won't be any worse than what I went through last night.  |
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Post by Sweet Pea on Dec 4, 2007 14:15:47 GMT -5
I finally got home, pulled into the driveway, and turned off the car, I couldn't get out. I just sat there, in the darkness. I really felt like crying, but I couldn't. I just felt awful and I really wanted to just punch the steering wheel and just go insane, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I got out, walked upstairs, and proceeded onto the rest of my night. I really don't know how else to put any of this. This is so embarrassing for me. Worst of all, this is not the first time that God or something has literally given me a break, but each time I just throw those breaks away. I don't know. Go ahead, say your worst. I know it won't be any worse than what I went through last night. well, maybe the gift was actually that you now know how serious this is and that you can't ignore it or distract yourself from it or the consequences will be severe. so now, what's the first step you plan to take to improve this situation? do you know where you plan to start? |
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Post by ball4yourout on Dec 4, 2007 14:38:53 GMT -5
well, maybe the gift was actually that you now know how serious this is and that you can't ignore it or distract yourself from it or the consequences will be severe. so now, what's the first step you plan to take to improve this situation? do you know where you plan to start? I've known how serious it is for a long time. These are just reminders and each reminder hurts more and more. I have no idea what to do or where to start. |
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Post by MrNice on Dec 4, 2007 14:56:08 GMT -5
you must first accept the possibility that nothing will happen - then you can do something
I also suggest to stop thinking in terms concepts that this is 'a break from god' or 'i saw her in my dreams so I must be in love with her'
there is nothing special about the situation
I know it doesn't feel that way, but it will relieve pressure a little bit if you don't deliberately add importance to it
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Post by bella2007 on Dec 4, 2007 22:02:07 GMT -5
Well, I think of situations like this as "signs" from God. Do you? I feel he is setting you on a path and depending on wether or not you make the right choices you will contine down a path that will inturn help you meet your destiny. If you chose nothing...then nothing will happen! Its up to you. Sometimes even taking a step back or moving forward is a choice and can lead you one way or the other. That's for you to decide...if change nothing in your outlook, than nothing can possibly l change for you in this situation :=) Nothing has happened with my shy-guy because i haven't seen him in almost a week. I had a death in the family so i haven't been at work. I am leaving it up to God! At this point, i feel if he's the one for me than we will continue on each others path if not then it will disappear into dust and my new direction (or destiny) will be realized!!! I have treid, i have hoped and i have prayed...so i will leave it up to fate now! Whenever i hit a wall like this i always back up a bit and something ALWAYS happens to put me back on track or take me into a whole new direction!!! I feel what happen to you was a law of attraction experience (which i beleive in) what you place attention on...what you focus on and put your energy into grows and eventually comes into your life...you must feel as if you are attracting to you what you desire WITH NO DOUBT in your mind what so ever...havung doubt makes things happen slower or stall completely!!! I think you are attracting situations like this one bcuz this is where your energy and mind are at!!!!!!! Make sense?  |
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Post by Sweet Pea on Dec 4, 2007 22:21:30 GMT -5
Well, I think of situations like this as "signs" from God. Do you? I feel he is setting you on a path and depending on wether or not you make the right choices you will contine down a path that will inturn help you meet your destiny. If you chose nothing...then nothing will happen! Its up to you. Sometimes even taking a step back or moving forward is a choice and can lead you one way or the other. That's for you to decide...if change nothing in your outlook, than nothing can possibly l change for you in this situation :=) Nothing has happened with my shy-guy because i haven't seen him in almost a week. I had a death in the family so i haven't been at work. I am leaving it up to God! At this point, i feel if he's the one for me than we will continue on each others path if not then it will disappear into dust and my new direction (or destiny) will be realized!!! I have treid, i have hoped and i have prayed...so i will leave it up to fate now! Whenever i hit a wall like this i always back up a bit and something ALWAYS happens to put me back on track or take me into a whole new direction!!! I feel what happen to you was a law of attraction experience (which i beleive in) what you place attention on...what you focus on and put your energy into grows and eventually comes into your life...you must feel as if you are attracting to you what you desire WITH NO DOUBT in your mind what so ever...havung doubt makes things happen slower or stall completely!!! I think you are attracting situations like this one bcuz this is where your energy and mind are at!!!!!!! Make sense? i'm confused...didn't you say this guy has hardly said anything to you so far beyond common courtesies? if so, how can you possibly know he's your DESTINY!!! i mean, all you really know about him is that you find him physically appealing and that he's shy right? isn't there a lot more to him than that? and how much does he really know about you? |
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Post by ball4yourout on Dec 5, 2007 1:11:38 GMT -5
The only thing that's for sure is that I can't get it done and I'm going crazy.
Am I adding value to it? No I am not. Here's what I know: I like this girl and this latest incident shows that I have had more than enough chances to get something started and I haven't done it. The mere fact I had this latest experience shows I caught a break, because its not like I get out that often.
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Post by bella2007 on Dec 5, 2007 9:49:27 GMT -5
I didn't say i KNOW he's my destiny!!! I said IF he is then things will progress, if not then it will disappear. I have done what i can, i feel to make him know how i feel...if his shyness is this extreme then he has to WANT TO CHANGE IT i can't do it for him!!! As far as what i know....i know alot but nothing that i can make much sense out of or even want to at this point. Preparing himself to speak to me...having to look out a window to approach me for a 2 min conversation  speaks volumes to many people!!!!! He gets red in the face, has dry mouth, looks down sometimes when we talk...WHY? He doesn't do it with anyone else either...male or female!!! These are just a few things and theres ALOT more! But i have let it go....so if its meant to be....it will be! It has to come from HIM bottom line!!! I don't want to struggle with this any longer, that's why i leave it up to God. |
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Post by ball4yourout on Dec 5, 2007 13:01:31 GMT -5
Do you feel that there is nothing you can do to make him feel at ease? I know we warned you not to overwhelm him, but I am wondering if perhaps you can get closer to him without making feel like anything's changing too quickly. I care a lot about this guy now. His success is sort of my success.  |
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Post by phoenixferret on Dec 5, 2007 15:35:06 GMT -5
I didn't say i KNOW he's my destiny!!! I said IF he is then things will progress, if not then it will disappear. I have done what i can, i feel to make him know how i feel...if his shyness is this extreme then he has to WANT TO CHANGE IT i can't do it for him!!! As far as what i know....i know alot but nothing that i can make much sense out of or even want to at this point. Preparing himself to speak to me...having to look out a window to approach me for a 2 min conversation speaks volumes to many people!!!!! He gets red in the face, has dry mouth, looks down sometimes when we talk...WHY? He doesn't do it with anyone else either...male or female!!! These are just a few things and theres ALOT more! But i have let it go....so if its meant to be....it will be! It has to come from HIM bottom line!!! I don't want to struggle with this any longer, that's why i leave it up to God. So in other words, anything that happens EVER is your destiny!!! Because if it happens, it must have been destiny all along!!!! You shouldn't bother doing anything, ever, because if you do it's destined, and if you don't it's destined!!! Guy acting weird? Everyday human attraction? That's so rare and remarkable, it must be a SIGN!!! From God!!! It's not the second coming; you've got a crush. Try to keep a little perspective. As SP pointed out, you're physically attracted to a man--there's nothing mystical or magical about it. All you're doing by fobbing off responsibility on this guy or on God or on destiny is making hifalutin excuses. I sure hope you're as dreamy as you and your friends think you are, 'cause "destiny" tends not to deal too kindly with those who take the passive approach to getting what they want. |
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Post by MrNice on Dec 5, 2007 16:05:33 GMT -5
it is up to the guy to make some moves
she can't live his life for him
yeah its a crush - but I bet its nothing compare to a crush that the guy in this thread has - much more mild - easier to give up
I have been in a situation where a girl liked me and I liked her and she was giving me very obvious signs to the point of basically grabbing me and making out with me
I still didn't know what to do at that point - and she gave up soon afterwards and moved on
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Post by ball4yourout on Dec 5, 2007 22:10:16 GMT -5
I dunno, it seems like bella genuinely feels for this guy's predicament. When you go as far as feel sorry for someone, its definitely some deep feelings there. But what the hell do I know. I'm the one who chickens out when a great opportunity is handed to me on a silver platter.  |
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speaks volumes to many people!!!!! He gets red in the face, has dry mouth, looks down sometimes when we talk...WHY?
