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Post by ball4yourout on Dec 7, 2007 1:20:55 GMT -5
While you all are contemplating your responses, I just want to point out it snowed where I live. And all I could think about was how nice and fun it'd be to get into a snowball fight with her... Maybe I should throw a snowball at her, see what happens.  |
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Post by Sweet Pea on Dec 7, 2007 2:29:52 GMT -5
While you all are contemplating your responses, I just want to point out it snowed where I live. And all I could think about was how nice and fun it'd be to get into a snowball fight with her... Maybe I should throw a snowball at her, see what happens. absolutely. sounds like an icebreaker...oh that was lame...just make sure you don't hit her in the head. that might piss her off, lol. |
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Post by Kris on Dec 7, 2007 5:49:07 GMT -5
Just don't throw one unexpectedly. You might also want to 'test' to see if she's alright with a snowball fight; some people don't like getting hit at all. Others, they may simply not feel like it at the time. Now, when I say test, I mean something like holding a snowball and sort of looking at her with an "I'm gonna throw this at you..." expression. Just don't make the expression 'evil' looking. I'm gonna throw this at you... mwahahahahaaaa!  Not like that, okay?  |
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Post by ball4yourout on Dec 7, 2007 9:15:36 GMT -5
Ha ha, thanks for your help. Yeah, I was spreading out salt the other night and saw all the snow falling and it felt almost magical and romantic. I wondered how great it would be to get into a snowball fight and then chase her down in the snow.
Ah, dreams.
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Post by bella2007 on Dec 7, 2007 9:54:54 GMT -5
Thank you ball4yourout i do care about him alot as a person I am not going to explain myself to anyone...its more than just that i think he's cute...he has said some really sweet things about me to people and i know he cares but his shyness prevents him from telling me himself, but i will move on from that. I say with your girl that all those romantic dreams are beautiful and that you need to TRY to do something to get things going. I now its hard and i know it would be a major step for you to get out of your comfort zone...but don't you think a romantic, snowy night...chasing each other around...throwing snow (as it glistens in her long hair) is well worth it? I do...I love snow i am on the east coast and I would love all that with a man i was crazy about and was crazy about me. Does she kiss you on the cheek at the end of this dream  |
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Post by Sweet Pea on Dec 7, 2007 10:27:12 GMT -5
Thank you ball4yourout i do care about him alot as a person I am not going to explain myself to anyone...its more than just that i think he's cute...he has said some really sweet things about me to people and i know he cares but his shyness prevents him from telling me himself, but i will move on from that. you certainly don't need to explain yourself to anybody. that's your perogative. and there may be more to the story than you've posted here. it's hard to put all the nuances down in text. i just know that it's impossible to get to know someone unless they open up and let you in. but i really do wish you luck in getting to know your shy guy. i hope it works out as you dream it will. |
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Post by ball4yourout on Dec 7, 2007 13:47:52 GMT -5
Thank you ball4yourout i do care about him alot as a person That's definitely what it sounded like. Love is something people can't truly comprehend or understand. Its just there and is. That's all that really matters. Okay Bella, now you're just driving me insane. Yeah, it would definitely be worth it. And what you just said to me, it just made me fell all warm and fuzzy inside. It may never come true, but its much appreciated. I hope it snows again, just so I can see myself and her out there once more. Unfortunately, that one dream I did have about her in my sleep, she didn't even notice me.  |
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Post by strawberrysweetie on Dec 7, 2007 15:46:21 GMT -5
Yeah, I was spreading out salt the other night and saw all the snow falling and it felt almost magical and romantic. I wondered how great it would be to get into a snowball fight and then chase her down in the snow. Ah, dreams. Aww...dreams like this are nice. I've had this type of snow dream before, as well. Must be so nice in real life.  |
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Post by bella2007 on Dec 8, 2007 9:58:41 GMT -5
"Unfortunately, that one dream I did have about her in my sleep, she didn't even notice me. "
Thats the great thing about dreams...you can make them into anything you want!!!!
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Post by ball4yourout on Dec 8, 2007 14:24:47 GMT -5
Well, I certainly didn't occur the way I wanted... so much for being able to make them into anything...
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Post by Sweet Pea on Dec 8, 2007 16:10:42 GMT -5
Well, I certainly didn't occur the way I wanted... so much for being able to make them into anything... try daydreaming...you have a little more control there. |
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Post by ball4yourout on Dec 8, 2007 16:43:40 GMT -5
Ha ha. The weather today is nice, maybe that'll do something as well.
Some bad enws, though. The semseter's ending in a few days, so this may very well be the last time I ever see her. I really don't know how I'm going to cope with never sitting right behind her again, looking at her hair, etc. I said it once, I'll say it again. its driving me crazy.
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Post by carboncopy on Dec 8, 2007 21:33:29 GMT -5
Ha ha. The weather today is nice, maybe that'll do something as well. Some bad enws, though. The semseter's ending in a few days, so this may very well be the last time I ever see her. I really don't know how I'm going to cope with never sitting right behind her again, looking at her hair, etc. I said it once, I'll say it again. its driving me crazy. If you don't talk to her then yes, you will lose track of her. You have to ask yourself if the anxiety and potential embarassment of being shut-down outweigh the potential for something good to happen. Also consider the fact that if you don't take a chance with this girl then you are not going to do it with the next one, and the next one, and.... you get the picture. You will have to break the cycle at some point and it's better to do it sooner. I know how it feels to fancy a girl where it seems that there is no way in the world that you could ever get over her, but trust me - you will. I am pretty sure that you will not take any action with her because you are not ready, but the main concern is for you to get over her as quickly as possible. There will be other crushes and the key is to act on them as soon as they appear. Contrary to your romantic day-dreaming, women are usually very pragmatic and even if you approach this girl you will get a rather cold reception and she will make it clear to you that you're just a face in the crowd and certainly nothing special to her. If you do work up the courage - be prepared for that. Many guys have already figured that out and that's why they are advocating not to "put all eggs in one basket" or in other words don't commit to pursuing one woman for a very long time because it will be wasted. Ideally you can strike up a conversation with her without any expectations, there is a chance you'll get lucky, and if it goes nowhere - move on to someone else. It seems though that you need to go through a couple of heartbreaks before you can do that so all I can do is wish you good luck. Maybe you will beat the odds!! |
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Post by bella2007 on Dec 9, 2007 11:01:53 GMT -5
I just found this article on social phobia & shyness around the opposite sex...
''If you avoid talking to attractive members of the opposite sex because you imagine them possibly rejecting you and imagine how awful that would be to experience, you are experiencing debilitating anxiety, not fear.
Some people experience such intense anxiety that even if an attractive member of the opposite sex gives clear signals that he or she wants to strike up a conversation these people ISOLATE and AVOID such encounters, preoccupied by the fantasy of how awful it would be to make a verbal mistake or a social faux paus and how terribly they would be rejected by this attractive person if they made such a verbal or social slip.
Fear then, is not anxiety. Anxiety is not fear. One is healthy, one is an emotional disturbance.''
Its sounds EXACTLY like the guy i know :-(
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Post by carboncopy on Dec 9, 2007 11:59:22 GMT -5
I didn't say i KNOW he's my destiny!!! I said IF he is then things will progress, if not then it will disappear. I have done what i can, i feel to make him know how i feel...if his shyness is this extreme then he has to WANT TO CHANGE IT i can't do it for him!!! As far as what i know....i know alot but nothing that i can make much sense out of or even want to at this point. Preparing himself to speak to me...having to look out a window to approach me for a 2 min conversation  speaks volumes to many people!!!!! He gets red in the face, has dry mouth, looks down sometimes when we talk...WHY?  He doesn't do it with anyone else either...male or female!!! These are just a few things and theres ALOT more! But i have let it go....so if its meant to be....it will be! It has to come from HIM bottom line!!! I don't want to struggle with this any longer, that's why i leave it up to God. Maybe I've missed something in this long thread, but rather than committing the situation into the hands of fate/god/martians maybe you should try to ask him out? Why does it have to come from him? |
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speaks volumes to many people!!!!! He gets red in the face, has dry mouth, looks down sometimes when we talk...WHY?
He doesn't do it with anyone else either...male or female!!! These are just a few things and theres ALOT more! But i have let it go....so if its meant to be....it will be!